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Summary of Question:	I Feel Isolated And Unhappy
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Monday, 10/30/2006 1:31 PM MDT

im a 22 year old singh in London and i feel isolated and depressed because all the sikhs are abandoning sikism i.e. all men becoming clean shaven and all sikh women not following sikhism and not being interested in turbanned men..........also my dad doesnt wear a turban he cut his hear when he was 17 and drinks and smokes............my mum does know some prayers but acts more like a hindu than a sikh she cooks meat and believes in the caste system.......all of this has led me to question my identity over the last couple of years since i was 19 and now since from six weeks ago up until now i have started to entertain the thought of thinking what i would look like without the turban......which is making me more depressed as i love wearing the turban but also at the same time im just tired of looking different if you know what i mean.........i dont smoke, drink or eat meat anyway not because of sikhism but more because of who i am but..........i just feel like giving up.....whats the point of keeping a turban if im getting no support from my parents or anyone.......im thinking of seeing a counsellor but they are all white and i need to speak to a sikh who is going or gone through the same situtation.........i consider my self a strong willed individual as i have lost 7 stone (100 pounds), had my teeth fixed and have started to keep my beard as of couple of weeks ago not to attract any female attention but to please my guru and become a better sikh............but i feel lonely as opposed to alone as i do have many friends some sikh but they cut their hair, drink, smoke have tattoos etc [the men and women].......i need some advise as i feel like giving up but i dont want to............because of wearing a turban i feel very proud but at the same time i have been traumatised because of it when i was 13 i was attacked in a park two older men in their 20s tried to take my turban off being young and weak i couldnt do anything i went to the teacher afterwards they called my mum she picked me up at school i told her what happened she told me to forget about it and never seak about it ever again...she told my dad but just he just asked if i was alright and went out drinking this left me very traumatised.

ive come to a point in my life where i feel lost and i dont know what to do.

so could you PLEASE advise me on what to do thankyou for reading.

(REPLY) Sat Nam. You must be a very great soul to be getting such severe testing! Since you are in London, I'm going to give you the name of a GurSikh there whom I believe can give you the support and encouragement you need to stand firm in your faith, and discover you are NOT alone! It is indeed sad and unfortunate that you are surrounded by family and "friends" who are not living up to the standards that our father Guru Gobind Singh set, but each of us is responsible for ourselves, and even if you stand alone, I know you will have the strength to stay on the path of righteousness. Remember there was one lone Sikh who stood on the toll road and demanded payment -- when he was the only one left of all of his comrades and the army that had been invaded! Anyway, please, please call Guru Kaur Khalsa in London at 44-207-394-8587 or contact her my email at: [email protected] and make an appointment to go over and meet her, and talk with her. (Tell her you got her contact information from SikhNet) I feel confident she will be able to help you. May God bless you and Guru guide you to fulfill your highest destiny with courage and grace. SP