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Summary of Question: | Need Advice |
Category: | Love & Marriage |
Date Posted: | Friday, 12/26/2003 4:48 PM MST |
At times I feel like crying and crying cause, its so hard. In addition to this, they will never let her come see me, so i have to take a six hour bus ride each way just to see her, and have all these restrictions put on us. We are not kids, were 22 yrs.old, and the weird thing is that her sister seems to always want to be in control, we have to get her permission. Its not fair, I dont know what to do. I have told her how I feel, she agrees with me, but she always plays it off.
(REPLY) Sat Nam. You say your "future wife" -- but has she - and her family really agreed to a marriage? Is there a specific date set? Meanwhile, what about your family? Have they made any attempt to contact her family, and make things smoother for you? I wonder if there is more to this picture than what you have written? Probably her parents (and sister) are trying to make sure that your relationship doesn't get too intimate before marriage. I know it's painful. All you can do is try to be extremely polite to her family, and focus on getting your career settled so that you will be in a position to support a wife. Remember, she doesn't want to have trouble with her family at this point in time (or ever, if it can be avoided!), and now she's not in a position (I assume) to have a major break with them. So , if you really love her, then to make her life easier, just grin and bear it, and prove through your actions (not just your words) that you respect this woman whom you want to marry, and you respect her parents. This will not be easy, but you need to be practical at this point in time until more definite plans for the future are possible. Are you praying every day before sunrise? Reciting Banis? Call on the Guru for wisdom and patience. Blessings, SP