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Summary of Question:In Love With An Amrithdhari
Category:Love & Marriage
Date Posted:Friday, 5/20/2011 2:29 PM MDT


I'm a Sikh girl who isn't amritdhari and cuts her hair but has fallen in love with an amritdhari boy. We dated about a year ago, but then we broke things off because he and I both felt that we needed to find ourselves before we would jump into a long-term relationship. I was heartbroken, and I've tried to forget him, but it's hard... even a year later. I've distanced myself from all of his friends as well as him but it doesn't work; I know he's trying hard to forget me too, and I feel as if he hasn't forgotten me either. Just recently, he told me he still did have something there for me. Although I cut my hair, I do not eat meat and I also pray. I'm scared to confess my feelings to him because the last time I did, he just told me he didn't, and then about a month later, he told me there was still something there. I know that we shouldn't have snogged and stuff but we did. But, it's not that aspect that wants me to be with him it isn't kaam I'm sure of it, I just deeply love him a lot, and I can't think of getting married to anyone else but him. I know I will probably have to take amrit if I am to marry him, but I'm not doing it for him, I want to show him that I love our Guru too. Right now, I'm fighting myself, I can't decide what to do or not! I know I shouldn't be feeling any sort of moh to anyone, but why am I so strongly attracted to hiim? I've even seen it him, whenever we run into each other we both act really funny and it's so weird for me to do or say anything. I've seen how he looks at me and I feel as if he still may love me, but is supressing his feelings. I don't care that we're not together right now, because I want to focus on myself right now as well, and get onto the path of Sikhi and do well in university, but I also don't want to waste my life away, and in the end, us not re-uniting again, because I really do want to marry him, even though I'm too young to think about marriage. What do I do? :(
How about accepting the challenge. The only thing stopping you from moving forward is your attachment to this young man. Let him go and stop flirting. If you care for him then find your love for Guru and become a devoted daughter of Siri Guru Granth Sahib. As it is you are pulling him away from his faith and this will not benefit you or him. Thats it. Let him go and be patient with your life. You have lots of time ahead of you to excell and be graceful.

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