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Summary of Question:	Guilt
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Tuesday, 9/16/2008 8:35 AM MDT

Gur Fateh

I am 24 yr old gurl from canada... i fell in love with this guy in high skool and we were so immature abt almost everything tht we didnt know wt love and marriage really means and we just made the decision tht we will marry each other and no other person and in that psychology of mind one day we just crossed all limits ... and im very ashamed and guilty abt my act of being involved in pre-marital sex ... i still love him.. we r still together and we still want to get married but right now concentrating on my master's degree but this feeling of guilt does not leaves me at any time .. i know premarital sex is not permitted in sikhi and we have never been into any physical relationship after that coz i realised tht it was biggest mistake of my life and i told him tht whether he wants to marry me or not i will not get involved in such activities.. he understood my feelings and respected those and never ever touched me after that.. its been many yrs now ... we only talk on fone and avoid meetings also in order to prevent any such mistakes to happen again... hez working and we r planning to get married once i get job after my master's graduation.... but this guilty feeling doesnt go.. i feel sorry for tht act every single day of my life and regret so much... i want to have god's love and blessing's with me all the time but then i feel tht coz i have committed such a sin god doesnt love me anymore... or he will punish me at some point in time... I have very supporting family (obviously they dont know abt tht incident tht happened in high skool) and even my to be husband is also very understanding and i have love around me but at the same time i feel tht i dont deserve it and feel insecure tht since i have committed such a big crime i will loose everything i have.. is there anything tht i can do to come out of this guilty feeling..?? plz help me finding some means to ask for forgiveness from baba ji and beg Him for his merci and love..

<<<<< REPLY >>>>>

Sat Nam Ji! - Tomorrow is gone. Gone. It does not exist except in your mind. You can only move forwards. Do not get stuck in the past and sit around playing the blame and guilt game. Don't focus on this boy. Focus on Maharaj Ji. When you do your Matha Tek, offer your guilt to Him and tell Him you do not want it any longer. Then release it to Him. As long as you hold it, you cannot move forwards. It is the actions you do, the thoughts you think and the words you say TODAY that create the future.

Much love and many blessings to you in the Name of the Guru, the Light of every Sikh, and the Holy Naam which holds the world.

.....G