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Summary of Question:	Too Much Lovw
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Wednesday, 11/16/2005 7:40 AM MST

hi, i just need to ask this question.

4 years ago now, i took amrit. it was a very strange experiance for me. i was practicing to take it but wasnt ready. my mind was still getting used to the change in lifestyle, i was still trying to get used to the idea of the change from what i was, to what i should be.

I was told by another family memeber that if i didnt take amrit soon, waheguru would kill me! and this was echod by my own mother. so never the less, i went and took it.
since then, to this day, i am not the pefect amrit dhari. i dont drink or eat meat, or steal or cheat. i do as much sewa as i can and always try to follow the right path. but my mind does still lust and i have done wrong.

but in saying that, my parents have forced me to marry an amrit dhari girl. she is a lovley person and very sweet. but now my own family wont let me live in peace. They hardley let us talk to eachother, they wont let us be happy at all. They make her cry and make me angry. My mother acts upon the instructions of her older sister who considers herself a "baba"...

this is having a serious inpact on my faith....i am losing it!
I dont have the money to move out, or even bring kids into this world.
We both serve as much as we can the guru, yet we go to bed crying.

Why?

---reply

From what you have said, it sounds like you have controlling parents. To save your faith, sanity and marriage you may want to consider creating a plan with your wife to save up the money and move out into your own place as soon as possible. Is there a friend or another relative that you could move in with until you have the funds? Make a plan with your wife, which may help you to keep up in the mean time. By identifying the problem and creating a strategy you can work together and be united in your goals. You will probably have to deal with parental negativity and bad feelings. You can also figure out a strategy of dealing with this. Be very kind and positive, like, "We have decided it is time to start our own place and would appreciate your support." If they will not support you, than you have to decide what is important to you. Usually parents come around, especially when Grandchildren start coming. Be strong and united with your wife. Let us know how you are doing. GTKK