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Summary of Question:	I Dont Know Why But I Want To Help?
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Sunday, 2/15/2009 3:23 PM MST

Waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh ji

I apologise if this sort of situation has been dealt with before on this forum but I am really helpless and trying to find out where am I wrong.

I love an amritdhari guy and our main interest was due to our faith and belief in Waheguru Ji. To put it into a nutshell, recently i have noticed that the guy has been neglecting me and talking to other girls online. I don;t mind but he tries to hide it from me so when I complain he says that I need to give him space.

So now i had enough and i told him that he is insulting guru ji's image give to him by talking to girls which is flirting. He believed that we will both get married later on in life, however, if there is a such in your life then you do not need to talk to other girls and if you do then dont hide it from the one you love. So now I told him that we both cannot continue as it really hurts me. He admitted that he is addicted to chatting and he doesnt know what to do.

I'm unsure wether our relation get back on track or not but i'm more concerned about his situation. I feel I should help him get over his addiction since it will only give him more pain and spoil his life further. I want to help him not as the person who loves him but as a friend as a Guru ji's sikh.

Could you please guide me as to how I should help him? Also how should I overcome myself, I mean I do not want to miss him but I do.

Please help me.
Waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh
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reply
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My dear sweet daughter.

Back off and leave him alone. You do not want to be a nag and a mother to him. This is not good use of your gifts as a Khalsa woman. And he will run away from you as fast as he can.

Rather, take YOUR insecurity about him and put it into this prayer.
Recite the "Sopurkh nirinjan har purkh nirinjan har agamaa....................." from Rehiras Sahib. Recite this prayer 11 times a day for him. This is using your greatest power which is the power of your prayer for him to be a saint and a man of God.

Your face should always be bright and shining and filled with love and admiration for him. This attitude will inspire him to acheive all that you suggest. Give it a try for the next 90 days and stop hovering over him and nagging. Just be the Grace of God for yourself and see how it uplifts him.

SK