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Summary of Question:Unmarried & Frustrated
Category:Meditation
Date Posted:Wednesday, 7/08/2009 10:26 PM MDT

hi,

I am a guy in the thirties.I am doing my masters after quiting my job.I had this habit of mastrubation since my college days.Now that I am studying I am unable to concentrate on my studies and I get frustrated when I see some young couple.I feel that I should have a female partner not only for sex but some sort of company but my parents are postponing my marriage and my desire for a family and married life has started to decrease.I am starting to think that why shld I wait anymore for sex when I can have it.Also sometime back when I was in my 25 year I started to meditate and slowly took control of the habit for two months after that again my work pressure has made me do this again.i am very positive peron thats the reason I wanted to stop it.Also sometimes my mind is so calm that i go into a room and meditate for hours without concentration loss but my age is causing me to go back to it again.I wanted to achieve in life and I am no more interested in family life.Please advice.

Thank you

--------reply--------
Sat nam. There have been so many questions/answers on masturbation on this forum, please research it using the search function and "masturbation." The simple answer that Guru gives us for all our problems is meditate meditate. Meditation gives you neutral mind, which gives you clarity of response. You act, not react. It will help calm the fires and over time you'll find that you live your dharma, not karma (cause and effect).
Seems to me you have not communicated to your family that the longer they make you wait, the less you care about a family. Seems to me it's your life not theirs, and it's unclear to me why you have surrendered that to them.
Suggest you get yourself involved in community activities -- Sikh or otherwise -- that give you an opportunity to (1) meet new people and (2) put your talents to some use outside of your regular life, which will allow you to shine.
Guru ang sang,
DKK



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