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Summary of Question:	Let U Down
Category:	General Q's from Non-Sikhs
Date Posted:	Monday, 6/30/2008 11:41 AM MDT

if always somebody let u down in ur family (specially ur massi).if she always used to tell that u don't deserve this or that.What would i do ? losing confidence, can't able to make my own decisions. need some advice.

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REPLY
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Sat Nam,

Making your own decisions requires some strength. Most importantly it means taking responsibility for your own life and dealing with consequences no matter what happens. You are the only one to blame and you are the only one to thank depending on the outcome. When you listen to someone's advise and do what they say you are still responsible for what you are doing just the same as listening to your own heart.

You have to ask yourself first if you are ready to accept that kind of responsibility no matter what. If the answer is yes, consider all possible outcomes of your decision and ask your self how you would feel if you took the responsibility, proceeded to do something your way and failed. Are you afraid of failure?

Failure is not a bad thing, it is actually a very good thing on the way to success but can you handle it?

The best answer to all your dilemmas in life is that there should be no one to blame at all. Whether you listen to someone else or yourself you are living your own life, you are always free to chose how to do it. Negative messages from outside don't mean anything. Building self confidence and knowledge of your inner self is a lot more meaningful.

If you think that you can be better than what other people say about you than be that. Be what you want to be. Be your own person, don't blame anyone for telling you that you can't do it, JUST DO IT, but be responsible for it and accept the consequences.

People who love you can give you lots of opinions and advice but it is you and you alone who has to decide what is right for you. Only you know what it is to be you. And if you don't know you will have plenty of opportunities in life to find out.

DK