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Summary of Question:Girlfriend Cut Her Hair
Date Posted:Friday, 1/11/2008 9:22 PM MST

Sat Shri Akaal ji,

I am a Sikh and have a girlfriend who is a sikh too.we have been together for about 5 years now and just to specify, we both are grown up adults, not kids.
I am currently in USA and she is in India. I visited last year and found that she had trimmed her hair. we had already talked about it before she did so and i had asked her not to do so, but she still did it. as a result we had a fight, but made up when she promised she wld never do it again.
Now only yesterday i heard that she has trimmed her hair further and didnt ask or tell me. I came to know through a common friend. Now i always had the notion that one who cant follow his/her faith, cant follow anything with dedication(including relations). Now i am at a cross road.i dont know what to do.
After the first time,in my heart, i had thought that if she does it again, she wont have any place in my life, but my feelings for her are strong and true.
Kindly suggest what I should do.

<<<<< REPLY >>>>>

Singh Ji - You cannot ask her not to trim her hairs. You can teach by example, and you can discuss it with her with an open heart. Have a relaxed, clear, open communication. Remain calm. Do not be judgemental. Try to understand what is going on in her mind. What is her real reason for trimming her hair? Go beyond rationalizations and get to the root of the motivation. The way out lies through your heart and through your compassion. If you judge her rigidly, you will simply push her away.


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