Previous

Next

Ask a Question

Summary of Question:	Cold Emotions
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Tuesday, 4/13/2004 5:53 PM MDT

Waheguru ji ka khalsa, waheGuru ji ki fateh.

Sat shiri akaal,
i am really confused and depressed, and i seek answers from you.
Well, in basic terms the past year has been the worse, i am in pain, emotionally and physically, i always do path, i missed a couple of days of out like 2.5 years ( i hope thats not y God is punishing me). But i feel like i am being punished for being a good guy. Everything i do, all my actions are to benefit others, i help everybody,regardless of my condition, basically i do selfless deeds. but being in soo much pain and suffering, like everday things go wrong,be it my work, still scared from my relatinoship that ended a while ago. those were darkest hours, but it appear, the dawn has never come and will not come. Even though i listent o kirtan everday day, ( sometimes i do it myself with my tabla,) and offcourse do path everday, sometimes rehansabai. But, with all this pain, my emotions are cold, i feel Sache patsha is punishing me, even though i ask for forgiveness everday, and i have not commited anything worth a punishment. With a dissaopointed self i come to you for advice. do not wish to bother you at any cost, but humbly ask for your conseling.
waheguru rakha
sincerely
M Sing

(REPLY) Sat Nam. First of all, I sincerely am sorry that you are in such pain. Second, there is no such thing as God "punishing" you. You are punishing yourself apparently, since you are asking for "forgiveness" -- I would guess that you are feeling guilty for something. Have you forgiven yourself? That's the first step. Let the past go. Happiness and misery start as thought waves in the mind. When we hold on to thoughts of sorrow and guilt and misery, they get stronger, and these thoughts turn into emotions, and we are stuck with them. The reality is, that if we were able to experience the truth within us, if we were actually experiencing our souls, we would be happy. It is good that you are doing path, and kirtan, but while you are doing these things, what is your mind doing? Another thing I believe you should consider is the possibility that your depression is actually a medical condition, and you need a medical opinion about that. Guru gave us Anand Sahib, the Shabd of Bliss to recite, and I would suggest that you sing that several times a day, and pray for Guru's blessing to experience Him! Things do "go wrong" in life, and what is important is the courage and patience with which we deal with them. There are times when everthing seems to go wrong, but all of this is temporary, the only permanent thing is your relationship with your soul, so take whatever challenges life brings you in stride, and -- this will sound difficult, if not impossible: give thanks for each and every thing that happens! Even the "bad" things -- give thanks, and know that the test of a man (or woman) is the acceptance of God's will in everything. Serving others is good, but don't make yourself into a martyr and resent doing your good deeds. Be sure you get enough physical exercise, and eat healthy food -- all these things contribute to our sense of well-being. May God bless you and Guru guide you. SP