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Summary of Question:	Am I Wrong For This?
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Wednesday, 11/17/2004 2:23 AM MST

Hi

I have a question regarding the "love" topic.
I'm a gursikh girl and I actually have started admiring this gursikh guy alot. We both go to the same gurdwara. Somtimes we talk, like saying gurfateh and he always smiles kindly at me. He has a very nice attitude towards everyone and seems like a very kind helping kind of a person. I think I'm really starting to admire him because of all this. Its not like I'm checkin him out or anything like that. But I havn't met any guy whos so nice like him it and it realy pulls me towards him. Also he's always very attentive at the gurdwara, like he doesn't stare at anyone and I've noticed that he's always absorbed into the kirtan or whateva thats going on, and I really have alot of respect towards him for being like that.

Am I wrong to have these feelings for him? I really wish for a future with him, am I wrong to feel this way? Or should I just erase all these feelings away?

Thanks in advance. Pls reply asap.

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RESPONSE
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Attractions are natural, especially if the person has similar values and interests. Being a Gursikh women...you will naturally want to meet a Gursikh man who shares similar practices. It is ok to be attracted to someone and have feelings. There is nothing wrong with this. It is great that this person is devoted and has good "vibe".

I would take things slowly and without expectations. Take a hukam from the Siri Guru Granth. Meditate on the best way to deal with your feelings and how to gracefully act on them. It would be good to just be friends and get to know each other over time. Later on you will know if there is mutual chemistry...and if marriage is in the picture.

Bottom line...slow down....make friends...don't get caught up with fantasies or expectations and let the Guru take care of the rest. Give it to him....and all will be taken care of.

GM