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Summary of Question:	A Realization - Perhaps?
Category:	Other
Date Posted:	Tuesday, 8/09/2005 2:25 PM MDT

I have often written to this forum, and asked for help in various issues that have been puzzling to me in my life -- specifically to do with Love and relationships. Time and time again, I felt that in every relationship that I have had, I was brought to the same turn and a similar face of disappointed reared its ugly head. Until recently when I really started to dig deeper into things. The obviousness of the situation and all the similarities were too much just to be chalked up to coinciendence. It just can't be. I know that the Diving god has brought us to teach us important lessons, and I had one lesson that I just couldn't understand... it jsut wouldn't sink in. And that lesson was to do with Attachment. Time and time again i have been taught, to love but not to be attached, to love but not loose the sense of self, to love but not forget that all are at His mercy and grace. I thought in the most recent relationship i had, i thought i was finally getting. Everytime, there were issues, I would leave up to the divine one, and things would work out for them selves. I recently wrote the forum about how a feeling of Maya, possessiveness and ankhar were taking over me, and i was hanging on to the significant other in my life. I was afraid at the outcome this would have.

Recently, I have read some insipirational readings and realized something. In all my past relationships, I had yearned for the people in my life to tell me that they love me -- yearn to hear those three words - " I Love you'. Yet i never got to hear them. And the one time that i did, they were only momentarily and after a while this person didn't feel this love that they once expressed. Today as I took a long walk, I realized that perhaps, just perhaps, that divine one, doesn't wish for me to be loved in such a way. That love which was expressed to me, and then never again, I always thought that i would be stuck in loveless relationships, were people(significant other) in my life would never tell me that they love me. But today i realized that it may not be that way. And perhaps He is trying to show me a much greater kind of love, one that lasts forever, is true, never fades, and is eternal. And no earthly love with another human being can ever compare. I feel that this is the message. I recently interacted with a person (signifcant other) who strongly believes in this love without attachment. Near the end of our relationship, it was his fear that i was attached to him that made him end things. Perhaps its to late, who knows, but i have realized that I no longer long for the love that fades,... because in the past it has faded... I would much rather be loved eternally...I feel like He is saying " those others didn't love you because you deserve a love much greater... much divine. that is the colour of love sent to us by the divine being... I think thats what He is trying to teach me... this is what I have I realized... does it make sense? If this is what my lesson is... i would like to dive into this deeper, and follow this love for the rest of existence. Please advise..

---reply

Congradulations on your realizations. You are right on. It is a very difficult realization for us to reach...especially we women. We are not programed to believe such things. You have this elevated feeling right now. To keep it strong and even to grow it stronger in you, meditate, do path, whatever helps you to keep your connection to the Divine strong. Blessings. GTKK