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Summary of Question:	Marrying For Happiness - Wrong?
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Sunday, 4/29/2007 1:29 PM MDT

Cut a long story short, having gone through the forum, I am dissapointed with the views from certain individuals.

I have no doubt that they are men, as I have had conversation of these sort face to face with men I know.
I am a sikh female, (almost 30 yrs old). I have always wanted to marry someone with a turban, beard etc unfortunatley I didn't meet anyone.
The men I have met in the past are bad examples (they are turbaned sikhs). As I've got older I have seen how idol indian guys actually are.
I am traditional, proud of being sikh & like our traditions.
I have done well in my career & I know what I want to achieve in years to come.
By the way what I have achieved as a sikh female puts guys off, as most of the are still at home and got nothing to show for it. I'd call them typical.
I have now met a guy & to my surprise I get on so well with him, we share the same thoughts, values & we have a very good relationship. He's not sikh, he's white. I've always thought in the past how can sikhs date non-sikhs & always told myself I couldn't. Thing is you can't help who you fall for.
I have met so many people in a similar situation as myself.
I just want to say people who aren't the situation please refrain from passing your judgement. Life is difficult as it is, you guys make it worse. So what if a sikh girl dates a non-sikh, it's none of your business. God is the only one who can judge & you're not god... never will be. Before you go round slating sikh girls have a little think on how sikh you are yourself. A true sikh will not judge and gossip about others.
I know if & when I marry this guy (my intentions are to marry him), I will have problems all marriages do. I know sikhs that have married just because it's the done thing and then go around having affairs left right and centre. For some reason guys think this is ok & even cover up for each other. It's quite sick. Marriage is when two souls become one, shares their values. It's not a physical thing, to make it work you have to try damn hard.
So next time you see a sikh dating/married to a non sikh, please mind your own business... you are not GOD.
I can asure you these people are already feeling scared and worried about losing one another instead of having mindless people make uneccessary remarks about their relationship. Take it from me they (& I) wouldn't have chosen to take a difficult path for the fun of it.
Sikhnet your comments will also be much appreciated.
Thank you.
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reply
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My dear,
Many blessings to you on your path.
Keep up with your faith and trust in your true values. The people that judge are the majority. But then there are a few people who have compassion and who look deeply. Perhaps you are one of those people.

True, a turban and beard is no garantee. Yet, your faith and desire to find the man of calibre and consiousness will be rewarded. Sometimes we have to believe in Guru and God to fulfill us and then we need the patience and devotional practice to attract the man of spirit to us. Looking around us at judgement in judgement is the same.

You sound level headed and also very ready to practice your empowering Gurbani. You should be successful in your choice with this as a foundation and practice for your life.
Blessings to you,
SKKK