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Summary of Question:	Disown
Category:	Other
Date Posted:	Friday, 9/13/2002 9:16 AM MDT

Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Vaheguru Ji Ki Fathe

I have been forced to stay away from my sister because she has married someone out of caste....I have only seen her newborn baby once since she born...she is now 6 months old...Everybody knows that I am being treated unjustly but no-one will support me...not even my husband....Either I believe in my Guru and continue what I feel is right which I feel may ultimately lead to sacrificing my family....or I please my inlaws and my husband and lose my sister.........

You cannot tell me what to do...and you won't because the consequences mean I lose out either way... maybe you can tell me how you read the situation...i can only learn from you.

(REPLY) Sat Nam. What a sad situation you are in. As you say, you seem to lose either way. It is hard for me, as a westerner, and only a Sikh for 30 year (and I'm 73!) to believe or imagine that people could be so cruel and ignorant as to shun someone because they have married outside of "caste" Guru Gobind Singh abolished the caste labels when he named men Singh, and women Kaur, and even as far back as Guru Nanak taught equality of all people. I do not understand some of the Punjabi words in your message, but I think I get the general idea. My prayers are with you that somehow, Guru Ram Das, the Lord of Miracles will bring enlightenment to your husband and in-laws. Blessings, SP
I would not wish this situation on my enemy....It is killing me....isn't Sikhi supposed to strenghten???.....I have read many a text re Jaat Paat....I have heard many Giani do katha about how un-sikhi it is.....is there any point when people nod in the gurudwara and show their akkar in the home and in front of their family??? - yes, the point is they are doing the seva of re-iterating the Guru's teachings....we are the pakandi who lie in the presence of Guru Ji...

I look forward to hearing your vichaar...
Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Vaheguru Ji Ki Fathe