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Summary of Question:	I Had To Put My Cat Down...
Category:	Other
Date Posted:	Thursday, 12/11/2003 2:51 PM MST

Sat Nam.

This past Monday, we had to put my dear cat to sleep. He would have been 19 in a couple of months, and he was going into liver failure. We didn't want our baby to suffer. He went away purring as my husband read Kirtan Sohila and Ardas, and as I kept telling him how much we loved him. I thank our Guruji he's not suffering any more.

But I'm going bats in the meantime. Yesterday I went on a shopping freak and broke down in the mall. Then I had to go to work in a place where I have to sell smiles and happy talk along with bath-and-body goodies, and all I can think of is what a flipping hypocrite I felt like, pretending to be jolly when I really want to throw things and cry and scream. And the guilt comes in too, because even though we did this to keep Fritzie from suffering, I fear I may have done some kind of sin in this and that my karma is going to get more overdrawn than may checkbook. And then more guilt, because this time I'm thinking that this rationale is really selfish. I would not have made that cat suffer in pain when nothing could be done. So why do I feel like I need to be committed?

I once heard of a prayer calling for the protection of the Gurus, calling for one in front, one behind, one on either side of me. I don't remember the names of the Gurus in this prayer or the actual words. If someone knows this, I'd appreciate it mightily if you all could put it forth; or anything else that might give me a little peace so I don't have another freak fit? I hope I'm not being some selfish little so-and-so. I really loved my boy. I'm just full of racing, crazy thoughts at the moment. He was such a sweet little companion, and I miss him so much it's making me nuts.

Many thanks.

Elizabeth

(REPLY) Sat Nam. There is no reason for you to feel guilty for putting your beloved friend and companion of nearly 19 years out of his misery. Somehow, you think that you have to be miserable to prove that you loved him. That is ridiculous. Letting an animal suffer unnecessarily would have been cruel. It's natural to be sad, but you are way too emotional about it, and you need to realize that your love for the cat was a very, very deep attachment, and true love would not create such pain for you. When we love, we want what is best for the object of our love. It is the attachment that is causing you pain now, because you can't let go, and that is why you are suffering and going berserk. So, stop it! It is quite inappropriate and shows a great lack of consciousness. You are focusing on YOUR loss, and not on what was and is best for the animal. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, and by all means call upon the Guru's to help you gain some intelligent perspective on this situation. It is natural to feel sad at the loss. Any cat or dog owner feels sad when the pet, who has become like a member of the family dies of any cause. But you have gone to an extreme that is way out of proportion, and you need to stop it. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, because that is really what it is. Have some courage, and some self respect and pull yourself out of this emotional quicksand. People at this moment in many parts of the Earth are going through major tragedies with courage and patience. You need to be grateful for whatever God has chosen to give you in this lifetime, and remember everything comes from God, and everything shall return to God, including you and me. You still have your husband! The fastest way I can suggest to get proper perspective on all life and death is to read (and understand) Japjji Sahib first thing in the morning. In additions, the mantra for protection you asked for, with the visualization is as follows:

AAD GURAY NAMEH (picture Guru Nanak on your right side)

JUGAAD GURAY NAMEH (Picture Guru Angad behind you)

SAT GURAY NAMEH (Picture Guru Amar Das on your left side)

SIRI GURU DAYVAY NAMEH (Picture Guru Ram Das in front of you.)

Best wishes, SP