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Summary of Question:	Efforts Or Sanjog?
Category:	Other
Date Posted:	Saturday, 9/13/2008 9:50 AM MDT

i m young girl about to turn 25...m post graduate with teacher training also...i m employed ...my parents wish to get me married and since some of my frnds and cousins 've also got married i also now wish the same but the thing is my parents just say very eagerly that i should be married now and also that it is high time..same do my close relatives say...but they are not trying for it.. i mean they never give my matrimonial add and never do they contact any of the matrimonial adds posted by families of prospective grooms nor r they surfing net for it and not even working through social contacts .....i m sure of it.....it can't be so that they are trying and it is not in my knowledge....as my mother often says ,"people try a lot but we are not doing that"...and she ends up saying that "it is all a matter of sanjog" ....i don't ask them anything neither do i show that i am willing she says it by her own...they also say that it is getting late but then too the situation is this....my worry is that i live in india and i wish to settle abroad....but it is not possible for me to move their all alone i need my life partner my job does not offer me any kind of foreign exposure and moreover i've many thoughts about my career as where would i finally stand...i really get confused as if this is my destiny or my parents decisions.....i don't understand....how can sanjog shine or rise when there won't be any effort from my parents side...they r so loveable and nice....but why this? kindly help...i really get worried at times.

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reply
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Dear one,

Have a meeting with your parents and a brother or sister or Auntie (someone in your family who has an interest in you). Set a time and a day to meet for 1 hour or more to discuss how to proceed. It may be too much for your parents to place the add in the paper or the request online.

But be sure once you get replies, they will definitely want to be involved. So you and a cousin/brother/uncle/aunt....can start the inquiries.

The meeting would be to discuss that you will be starting and what you want to say that you are looking for. I know for a fact of so many eligible young sardars in England, Canada, USA etc that there is opportunity to settle outside of India.

As far as your work that is a bridge to cross when you get to the place you settle. You start the process now and enjoy bringing the people and resources together.

God bless you,

SK