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Summary of Question:	Hair And Handicapped Brother
Category:	Hair
Date Posted:	Saturday, 3/03/2007 11:45 PM MST

I have am torn between faith and practicality. I am faced with a dilemma. My brother is weak mentally; his nervous system especially motor nervous system was damaged during childbirth, he is now 30+. His movements are not very well coordinated, he can’t drive, his reflex action is very slow, he is a very slow learner. This also limits him in his daily life, he cant do a lot of things that normal people can do and is very slow in understanding. However, lucky for him my parents have devoted their lives to help him, my mom gave up her career early on in life (even though she was a doctor) to help my brother in schooling or business or work. I think he has been able to get through life with not as much difficulty as he would have faced if he were alone.

My point is with all this he has maintained till this age an identity of Sikh, he wears turban and keeps hair just like my dad. And he has been able to do all this with the help of my dad who helps him tie his turban look neat and well kept. They have tried to teach him turban or tying his hair but in vain. However, now he is getting older and so are my parents and I fear since he can’t do all this on his own its best for him to cut his hair. I hate forcing religious beliefs on my brother knowing he is weak. Also he is not very opinionated I have tried reasoning with him to know his opinion but he also seems confused on one hand he fears this will upset my parents and on the other he knows it will help him become less dependant.

Please advice what should I do under these circumstances, I think its in his best interest to be practical in this life and have his hair cut. I personally feel its good for him but I am very confused.

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Sat nam. This decision is purely up to him. Please stay out of it. He has to decide if he wants to carry the form of Guru Gobind Singh, it is not a family decision. It's a personal decision. Tell him you support him EITHER way and let it be.
If he chooses to keep his hair, understand that as Sikhs, helping him tie jura and dastar is an opportunity to SERVE, daily details of which can surely be figured out.
Guru ang sang.
DK