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Summary of Question:	Dealing With Life After Katrina--Help!
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Saturday, 4/01/2006 6:34 PM MDT

We are having major problems me and my sister in law had to move to ower mother in laws house after we lost ower home form hurrican katrina.We understand that we have to maintain ower keep up around the house but it seems like we are only her maids she complains about everything that we dont do. she wants us to do things when she wants them to be done. we have been living on ower own for years but she thinks we are her little children we are already going through alot losing ower home but she makes it more stressful for us we dont now what to do. it seems like everytime she has something to say about someone in the house about what they are not doing but the thing is she dont do anything around the house unless her husband is in town. she always has to know where we are going and what we are doing and when we will be back. It is very stressful b/c we feel like we have no privacy at all i have alot more to say but i will be here forever telling you and anyways she is knocking on my fema trailer right now telling us to make sure we wash cloths.which we do everyday and it will get done but she just likes to tell us what to do!PLEASE help us with this situation Crystal & Sabrina

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Sat nam. My condolences on your experience with Katrina. My guess is your mother/mother-in law is having a tough time adapting herself to 2 more people in her household, and releases her stress by abusing you as you describe. You have several options as I see it from what you have said:
1. Stay put and take it and complain.
2. Stay put and draw a line. Do your fair share as you said, and no more. You must confront her on her actions not just take it because a hurricane left you homeless. As you said, you are not little children. Stand up for yourselves!
3. Move out and move on. The rest of your situation is unclear to me; I don't know if you are on social security or have a job or what, and I don't know the terms of FEMA's trailers, but if you decide to leave a FEMA trailer, you can. Others have done it, and so can you. You have to choose in your mind that your life will improve and then act on it. It's your life, what exactly is tying you there?
4. Seek counseling (all of you). 1-800-273-TALK is a number FEMA set up for counseling for evacuees. If that doesn't work, contact a local UNITED WAY or Red Cross office and ask if they are able to refer you to social services counseling for Katrina victims. The counseling may be free or sliding scale, and one thing they can do that I can't is realistically discuss your options for other housing, work, etc.
In any event pray for guidance.
God bless you,
DKK