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Summary of Question:	Does A Thing Called True Love Really Exist...
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Saturday, 5/10/2003 9:18 PM MDT

hi ,

satsriakal,
i just came to see this section in ur website.....like it....
i think it gives a lot of personal thinking space to the young teenagers of the next generation.... especially of the western world.... and heyy...... im not one among them. i am mature(a mature person won't say that, i kno),i make my decisions myself and they do get succesful...i am good in managing relationships..etc etc...
and i have not come here to need ur help to figure out some right decision...The question that i wanted to ask seems really immature....but i have always pondered over this question...pretty long...cant help...

To put in one sentence...."does a thing called true love really exist..."
i have seen my friends affairs....even good ones...i have seen successfull marraiges.....i have seen "just" friends.....
i really dont believe in the idea of thing called love as far as above cases are concerned...
all the affairs that i have seen were based directly/or indirectly on physical apperances and/or sexual attraction.....and the good ones..the platonic ones..the ones between good mature guys and gals..i feel they lacked that strong feeling called love ..like yearning for each other...they were just like sharing..laughing together..just like life companions of each other...just like just friends...and the marraiges..i think the husband and wife are caught in the trap of "farz" and marraige is needed to be socially acceptable....and they basically just get fed up of each other within first 2-3 years..after that its just ...same old life...and its responsibilties...and ofcourse daily capsule of sex....the relationship that i believe in is "frienship".......no hard feeings....no big expectations..no responsibilities......just plain strong understanding....sharing....laughing......no formalities..no gifts..no sorrys..no thankyou's

i think love if exists then only when u r immature..when ur heart is light to be taken away by small feelings....those senstive adoloscent feelings......

i think as a person becomes mature he gets more of responsible...tries to make him more succesfull....socially acceptable as a mature person..... and tries to make himself able enough to be socailly praised....and after marraige its all responsibilites that he has to satisfy....

and i think most of the couples come to kno they r in love only when they start missing each other...like if one of em goes out of station for a year....n they wept for one another....(a nice proof to their minds that they r in love)...n they think it just "happened" to them..they never knew it before....that is not love...that is just missing....and after a while u will be fine with that....love if exists shud be forever.....

and some couples just start pretending to themselves that they r in love...or like modify some other feeling(s) as love....i have seen this in many affairs...
i think there a lot of other feelings which seem to be close to love but they r not...just misspelled as "love"

and above all .......if a "pure" thing called true love really exists......
then first it has to be far far away from sexual attraction/physical appearance.....and second it has to be "forever"... n i dont think both things r there....practically speaking atleast...

so i will be extremely thankfull if ur reply with a good "practical" "defintion" of love

[email protected]
bye....

(REPLY)

Sat Nam. TRUE LOVE does exist -- but it is rare! True love is based on sacrifice, where you totally give, 100% to the beloved, and expect nothing in return. It is the kind of love that Guru Nanak and all the Gurus to follow had/have for humanity, the kind of love that enabled Guru Arjan to sit on the hot plate, so that he could set an example of courage and faith in God and surrender to God's will, for all Sikhs to follow. Great saints and masters have come to this world with true love, and are usually misunderstood because they love everyone! They see God in everyone! The best we can do is try to be selfless and kind, and first of all love God and Guru, and then hope to love God's creatures as well. God loves all His creatures, which is obvious, because God breathes in all of us all the time, until death when we return home to God. As for the typical human relationships, mostly they are based on attachment, lust, or social convenience. But if two people make every effort to live as Gursikhs, and marry consciously with the aspiration to blend their souls into one,and to serve and support each other, I believe that will grow into true love.