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Summary of Question:	What Should I Do?
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Monday, 7/15/2002 6:37 PM MDT

I HAVE A QUESTION,

IVE BEEN TOLD THAT I CAN MARRY WHOEVER I WANT AT LEAST HE HAS TO BE IN MY CAST BUT THE PROBLEM IS THAT THE BOY I WANT TO GET MARRIED WITH IS A AJATT BUT HIS ALST NAME IS S SANDHU
AND SO IS MY MOTHERS. THEY ARENT RELATED IN ANY WAY AND BEFORE I TELL MY PARENTS ABOUT THIS DECISION IVE MADE I WANTED TO MAKE SURE IF THAT WOULD BE A PROBLEM. THANK YOU FOR HELPING ME OUT

(REPLY) You're asking if it will be a problem, but you already know that it will be a problem with your parents! Because they are still considering such a thing as caste, which in this day and age makes no sense whatsoever. Guru Nanak all the way through Guru Gobind Singh - who even gave all sikh men the name "Singh" and all Sikh women the name "Kaur" to stop the identifying of "caste" of people by their names have emphasized that we should not differentiate nor discriminate about people of different color or country. So long as you are not related to this boy, there should not be a problem. What you have to do, however, is convince your parents that there's no problem! the important thing is, is he an honorable man? How does his family feel about your engagement? There is nothing in the Sikh religion to forbid a marriage such as you are describing. The problem is a cultural one. Obviously, the more two people have in common, the easier the marriage adjustment can be, with family and friends, but the fundamental bond between husband and wife is a spiritual one, based on mutual commitment to a way of life. If you both are Sikhs, and both bow to Siri Guru Granth Sahib as your Guru, why should there be any barrier to the marriage? May God bless you and Guru guide you. SP