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Summary of Question:	Need Your Help
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Monday, 9/12/2005 3:13 AM MDT

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji ki Fateh.

I have written to you earlier about about ten days ago but I haven't got any reply, i am just wondering weather you received my mail or not.

Following is my problem. My husband and me had a love marriage few years ago, we still love each other the same way. both my parents were against our marriage as my husband is from a low cast. At our wedding (lavaan) was blessed by my older brother who stood behind me in my fathers place. My brother does not believe the cast thing. My father did not attend my wedding at all and until today I am not allowed to step into his house neither have met him

Now the problem is that my husband have no respect for my brother at all. Out of all my siblings this is the only brother who is in touch with me till today. My husband was never close to my brother from day one.

Due the distance of about 600 kilometers my brother and me seldom meet. We only meet once or twice in two or three years.
When ever there is a occasion at my brother's place i have been going alone without my kids.
My husband never follows me neither he allows our kids to go.

Lately my brother came down to my place for few days, unfortunately my husband was outstation due to work purpose. Over the phone when I told him about my brothers presence my husband got very angry. He did not come back home until my brother and his family left.

Upon coming back home my husband shouted and fought with me, he said words that really hurt me. He criticize my brother and his family. He said things that like:- why did I let him (my brother) come in into our house, gandey lok, ganda lahoo, kutaa, haramjada came here to eat spoil my house, he think my house is a hotel, kaley mu vala, guunh khaan ayaa, came here to eat shit don't ever you dare let him come in again and etc......

Generally my husband doesn't get along with anybody except his own siblings. He hardly have any friend.

I am really hurt the way my husband criticize my brother all I can do is cry alone, he forgot if not for my brother we would not have been married to each other.

Giani Ji, please help me, give a special paath for me to do to improve my husband attitude, I really want my husband to get along with my brother and with other people around. I feel very ashamed going to my brothers place alone. And I am afraid that my husband may not allow me go anymore, my husband still grumbles when ever I receives a call from my brother, please give me some paath to do.

Thank you
sat sri akaal

(REPLY) Sat Nam. Many women have found that reciting the SoPurkh (section of Rehiras) eleven times a day has made a huge improvement in their husbands attitudes and behavior. Try it, for at least 40 days, and see what happens. May God bless you, and Guru give you courage, SP