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Summary of Question:Cap
Date Posted:Wednesday, 1/12/2000 2:08 PM MST

i have my friend who is also a sikh with turban,but sometime he wears cap while doing car wash and many other things . I used to tell him that it is wrong but he said that give me one good reason not to wear a cap? So please tell me something about this subject ? (he lives in us)


Dear Vicky,

It is a clear and defined idea in our Faith not to Judge. Unfortunately we all do it all the time in some way or other. In a case like this where you have already said something it is better to let it stay at that. The reason we do not judge is because you have to realize that the other person is you. Do you like it when you are doing something and someone tells you you are wrong. If you are going to say something to someone it should be in a way that you are not challenging them. You should worry about yourself before telling other people how to do things. I understand your intentions were good. I understand you would not say unless you cared. The next time you want to say something though it might be easier to just ask that person how they feel about it. Maybe they have an opinion that will make sense to you. If you still disagree with them you have to understand that before you give advice that have to be open to receiving it. Obviously this person you spoke to was not open to receiving your input as you thought he would be. Just keep in mind that when you want to help someone it might do well to introduce the subject. Talk about it and give the other person your thoughts about it.

As far as actually giving you something to say to him that will help to convince him. I have nothing to give you there. Each of us chooses to live life the way we see fit. The word of the Guru is what is important and he should have his own relationship with that. If he chooses not to wear his turban in public he has to deal with that not you. We should however make sure that people understand that part of our identity as Sikhs is wearing the Pagri, it is how people see us. So many people who are not wearing their Turbans or are slowly taking them off are doing so because of outside pressures. They are being effected by society. They have forgotten the incredible nature of our faith and the pride they should have in who they are and who they were raised to be. That is all I have for you. Just give a sense of pride in who you are stand tall, and others will see it and leading by example is the only solution to this problem. Thank you.


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