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Summary of Question:Curious If...?
Category:Love & Marriage
Date Posted:Monday, 2/14/2000 10:39 PM MST

WaheGuru Ji,

I am curious to know if certain acts are permitted : Viewing of pronographic videos before n after marriage, Oral sex after marriage, public display of affection (kissing n hugging in public) after marriage...

Thank you...


Dear One:
Sat Siri Akaal. Pornography as such was not common in Guruji's time (although prostitution certainly was), so it was not something that was openly discussed. Gurus were clear that women are equal to men in all ways and should be accorded the same respect as men. Since pornography denigrates women generally as well as the people shown in the pictures/films, it is not in keeping with Sikhi to partake of it or support this industry by buying or renting pornographic materials. Porn turns the people (usually the women) in the pictures into objects of use and abuse. Sikhs see God in all, and our purpose is to serve others by ELEVATING them, not denigrating them in any way, whether or not we know them personally.

Public Kissing and hugging after marriage is really not discussed in Siri Guru. Generally, Punjabi Sikhs frown upon ANY public displays of affection between married peple, but in the West, there is less stricture on this; simple displays of affection between married Sikhs don't receive the same censure as say, a heavy public makeout session would. A lot depends on the people involved, the place, what level of affection is being shown, and who all constitutes the 'public'. PASSIONATE displays of affection should be kept private.

Oral sex: What a married Sikh couple chooses to do in the bedroom is their business.

Guru rakha,

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