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Summary of Question:	Why M I Scared?
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Monday, 9/09/2002 11:53 AM MDT

waheguru ji !

khalsa ji .. althought i don't know .. but all i know that one sucha gursikh can give good advice..he can't be wrong.. so i want to ask you one question..have u every felt scared in life..while learning sikhi and becomeing one..that if u will be able to keep it..i took amrit..but i couldn' t keep it..and i started to do everything again..like cutting hair..but now for some reason i feel guilty when i think about cutting them..is feeling guilty and not having interest are same thing..i m sooo scared by seeing my past taht if i can be able to keep going on path of sikhi or not..w/o getting distracted...when i see others doing everything my heart get all confused if i m doing right..by not cutting hair..and then i get scared by feeling and thinking that my heart can't stay on path..so that means my love towards waheguru isn't much or not true and honest..i really get scared..and i asked these questions to n e one..cuz i m the only one here feeling this way in my family...and i have one more question..i push my heart soo hard to think of cutting hair or doing anything with hair of my body..is it bad..what i mean ..to push your heart is bad rather then living with what it wants..my mom says..that living with killing ur heart's wants[like eating meat, looking beautiful,] is bad
kindly
guru ki dhool

waheguru !

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REPLY
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Sat Siri Akaal. The only thing that will release or transmute your fear is chanting the Naam. It sounds like you are afraid of what others will think of you, whether or NOT you look Sikh. In the end, you cannot live what others want for you or you will forever be unhappy. You must live your own life from a space of the Truth inside of you as you understand it.

I am not going to tell you whether or not you should cut your hair, though observant Sikhs simply do NOT cut their hair. This web site is full of information about why we keep our hair and wear turbans. You can search this forum and this entire website and the internet for all the information you could possibly learn about Sikhi and our traditions, hair, turban, 5Ks, etc. I recommend you do this.

Your fears, though real in your mind, are unfounded. The One Creator Who created us all loves and cares for all of us, whether we are Sikh or Hindu or Christian,wearing turbans or not! Guru has told us time and again in Siri Guru Granth Sahib that the only way to peace in mind and heart is chanting the Naam, and in Siri Guru that instruction is for anyone and everyone. Whether or not you keep your hair you should chant the Naam. Go to a place or room where you can be undisturbed for at least 30 minutes. Sit quietly with a straight spine on the floor /on a pillow or in a chair. Cover your head with something to protect your crown and chant Wahay Guroo over and over. If you have a tape recording of this by some ragis or of someone chanting Mul Mantra (first lines of Siri Guru Granth Sahib), use that. Chanting WITH someone is even better, but not a requirement. Chant with your eyes closed for 30 minutes. Sing or chant, whisper or yell, whatever you prefer. Do this honestly and daily. Try it for 40 days, and see how you feel. Make no other decisions about your lifestyle until you feel your fears abate by this practice. Then you will KNOW in your heart what is right for you. Our parents and friends are not our heart. Your relationship with God and Guru is yours and yours alone. No one can tell you WHO you are and WHAT to be except God and Guru through your heart. God bless you. Guru ang sang,
-DKK