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Summary of Question:	About Guilt Feeling
Category:	Other
Date Posted:	Sunday, 4/15/2001 4:43 AM MDT

sat shree akaal,

i am 19 yrs of age. i am very much attached to my parents. But many a times i have to lie to them. I also do masturbate twice or thrice a week. I feel very bad about all this . when i lie to my parents i feel very guilty like i cheat them.I am a true believer and i go to gurudwara almost daily. i also do sewa there.
please guide me that how can iget rid of this guilt. i try hardest that i can to stop masturbating and lying but am unsuccesful in that.i also feel that masturbating has had an adverse effect on me mentally and physically. please suggest me how do i get out of this depression.
Reply:
********************************************************************************Greetings to you in the Name of God the light of every soul and in the Name of Guru the life of every Sikh.

First of all....take a big deep breath and hold that breath in for 60 seconds(one minute). Do this a few times until you feel yourself calm down. You can act clearly once you stop your emotional reaction. Breathe!

Stop feeling guilty! You are doing what you are doing, so at least relax in kniwing that God gave this capacity too.

You have reconized your problem and stated your intention. Great! This is the first step in changing your behavior.

Yes, it does take 40 days to make learn a new habit or break an old habit. I would suggest that you plan to understand and practice the following for the next 90 days.

Always start your process or stop the flow of your emotionality by holding your breath for one minute.

Evaluate that there are triggers or cues in your environment that creates in you the desire to masturbate.
Then, try to avoid that stimulation, or change your understanding of it. For example, if there is a girl whose presence stimulates you, start to pray for her well being as a sister, mother, daughter, etc. to relate to her consciousness rather than her body. If you are looking at pornography or sexually stimulating pictures, remove them from your environment and/or avoid them. Replace them with other literature that is not sexually stimulating to you.

The desire to masturbate occurs when the pituitary gland (in your forehead) tells the prostate gland (between your legs) to secrete. The pituitary is connected to the third eye, which is the center imagination and inner vision. Often, visual sexual fantasies will be seen at the third eye. Place the sound Satnam at your third eye by projecting Sat when you inhale, and Naam when you exhale. Do this as often as you remember.

Second, you must learn to raise your energy from the second chakra (sexual center). If you squat on the toilet in order to urinate, you can stop the urine flow 5-6 times by squeezing the sphincter muscle. Practice squeezing this muscle every time you urinate. Squeezing this muscle pulls the energy out of your penis and into your spine.

The yogic technique for raising your sexual energy to higher centers is called mul bhand (root lock). This involves squeezing the muscles of your rectum, sex organ (the sphincter muscle), and navel point. Try this process..........
Jog or run in place for 10-20 minutes. Make yourself sweat with exertion.

Now practice Sat Kriya:
Sit on your heels (put a cushion underneath you if necessary). Raise your arms over your head and stretch them straight up with the palms together. Your arms are hugging your ears. Lock your thumbs and interlace the fingers if needed to keep the palms together. Close your eyes and look up towards the top of your head. Inhale deeply and exhale fully several times. Then inhale and say 'Sut' (rhymes with but) while squeezing the rectum, squeezing the sphincter muscle, and then pulling in your navel. Then say 'Naam' and relax all the muscles. This should be rhythmic and you should be doing one 'Sut Naam' for every 2 seconds.

Practice this for 11 minutes to start and work up to 31 minutes for 40-90 days. In 90 days, you can learn to control your energy if not before.

Masturbation is a process of self-stimulation to the point of ejaculation. Semen is transmuted into ojas, which is the fluid of your spinal column. Ojas lubricates the spine allowing your energy to rise to the higher centers of your body. It takes eighty drops of blood to make one drop of semen, so this is a substantial loss of your energy.

Bottom line is.....you can do it. This is a mind thing. Give yourself the chance to win over your mind. Remember that your purpose as a human being is to live throughtfully and consciously. Animals react and live reflexively. Humans have the power of God consciousness. This "addiction" is your opportunity to learn mastery. Be grateful for this experiance and opportunity. It will change. You can do it. So, just start!

Keep up and you will be kept up! God bless you with victory. May the power of your one pointedness be turned around to be giving your life balance and happiness.
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