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Summary of Question:Hair Cutting For Health
Category:Hair
Date Posted:Wednesday, 11/13/2002 3:26 AM MST

Waheguru Ji KaKhalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

I am a teenager diagnosed with basilar's migraine. I have frequent headaches and throbbing in my head as well as giddiness which leads to blackouts.Aside from this migraine, I have a blood-circulation problem but this comes on ONLY when i put on my patka/turban. So, I have tried to use only the patka that covers my jura. However, I still get headaches. I have had three cases of blackout. In my last one, i fell down the stairs and broke a glass. My disease can be cured partly through medicine, but my headaches can still trigger off blackouts. I tied my hair just before before each blackout. In short, my keeping my hair is causing me grave danger. What if i blackout in front of a car next time? So, after thinking long and hard, I am still not sure what to do. I have tried every other possible option, short of cutting my hair, and I DONT want to cut my hair. My mother had a long discussion with me. She told me she doesnt want me to cut my hair, and she will 'only make the final painfull decision' should it come to a choice between my health and my hair. So actually if i want to i can just act and fake until she does so. But i dont. But should it come to that stage, when i have every reason to cut my hair, can I? We say we shouldnt cut out hair as to not interfere with the way of God . Every woman in my family has shaved her legs or waxed their hair off. They do it for beauty. I am THINKING about doing it to live a normal life. My mother says that is 'acceptable' by society but a man cutting his hair isnt. Is that fair at all?? What i am asking is, if the time comes, should i do good and bad by cutting my hair and dissapointing family or should i do good and evil by keeping my hair, jeapordizing my health and keeping my family happy?

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Sat Siri Akal.

God bless you, dear.

You wrote that you tied your hair before each blackout. If it's just the tying of your hair that's causing the health problems, the other option for you may be to keep your hair - but just have it untied. Or maybe braid it into a long braid down your back. Is it the hair that's the problem or the pressure created on your skull when you tie it up? If you don't black out just leaving your hair loose - then leave it loose. You may just not be able to wear a turban for a while until this gets sorted out and that's OK. God has His plans and even Sikhs can fall into the trap of ritual if we're not careful. Do what you need to do to take care of yourself.

But there's another issue here which, I think, is really important and that's the issue of the double standard. How and why Sikh women learned that shaving or waxing their legs in order to be beautiful was an acceptable Sikh practice is beyond me, but your mother has a double standard that has no foundation in the Sikh tradition. Sikh women, like Sikh men, need to keep their hair. All of it. The pressure on Sikh women to be beautiful through shaving is unfortunate, but the call of Guru Gobind Singh is for us to defy our social conventions and live in the purity of what God made us to be. So it is painful to you, and rightfully so, that your mother is not clear enough in her own values. If it's OK for her to shave her legs - then it's OK for you to cut your hair. And if she doesn't want you to cut your hair, then she needs to stop shaving her legs. It doesn't work to preach one set of values to your children and live another set of values yourself.

In the end, though, being a Sikh is a choice. Keeping hair is a choice. And that choice is up to you. Do you believe in what Guru Gobind Singh created? Are you willing to risk your health for that? This isn't about you and your relationship with your family. It's about you and your relationship with your own soul. You have to decide if you are a Sikh and whether or not you value your own hair and how much you value it. Whether you cut your hair or not is ultimately a decision that only you can make and only you can live with. So know who you are and what you value. And then make your decisions as a man and live your life.

All love,

GPK



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