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Summary of Question:	My Parents Or The Love Of My Life???????
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Sunday, 2/25/2001 11:39 AM MST

I have a big dilemma. I am 21 years old sikh female and I am dating a Hindu guy for almost 2 years. We both are deeply in love with eachother

and we want to get married. His parents don't have any problems us getting married, but my parents don't want this. They gave me an ultimatum:
stay with them and obbey their rules or pack my bags and leave the house. They even told me that i will be dead for them if i choose to be with
him. I love this guy so much, he's my future, but I love my parents aswell. They brought me up. I think its not fair of them to give me such an
ultimatum. At times I am really thinking to choose for my own happiness but I don't want to run away from home. What should I
do???????????????????
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Reply
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Greetings and blessings to you in the Name of God and Guru.

Dear one, you have a choice to make. It is between your emotions and between your centered mind. Do you know why your family is objecting to this man?

If this man is really a high caliber person who can support you and your family in your faith and Sikh traditions, then, you need to take some time, but you can win both. Do not jump into marriage so quickly. Give your family time to adjust to your wishes. Show them, over time how good and complementary this relationship is.

Have you discussed with this man the value of your faith and the integrity of your family's wishes for you? Best is for him to be supportive of you spiritually.

I would reccommend that you both agree to give your relationship a year of peaceful and slow integration to win the hearts and minds of your parents. Start by the 2 of you agreeing to recite Jap Ji Sahib daily in English either together or individually. Whichever circumstances can permit.

You can find the translation on http://www.sikhnet.com/s/gurugranthsahib under English translation. This daily practice for the next year will give you both great clarity and wisdom. It will complement your relationship and win you a future with your love and your family.

God bless you and keep up! SKKK