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Summary of Question:	Harmony In Marriage
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Saturday, 2/07/2009 10:12 PM MST

sat sri akal ji,

well my situation is pretty much this. i've been married for almost 5 years now. we've had ups and downs as is natural in any human relationship as husband and wife. my husband is from india, i was raised here in america. about a year and half ago my husband's brother came to america with his wife (the wife had lived in usa over 7 years prior but stayed in india after she married my husband's brother for whatever her reasons). anyways to make this short and to the point, i need help from you-- my husband has totally changed. i'm not a fan of believing in black magic and stuff like that since Guru Nanak Dev ji basically said we shouldn't be supersititious and stuff, but i've been living away from my husband for over a year and half now after an arguement with him regarding finances (its like i was constantly paying for things and he kept sending his money to india....he keeps says his family needs it, but his brother who came here now in the family is the one that spends all the money as if he's a millionaire and the whole family seems to treat his wife well as she is a relative of my husband's family prior to marriage also--the family is showing to her and their relatives that they are rich but with me my husband is always saying we have no money, etc. to do things or buy things). so back to the point, i'm living away from my husband, for a year and half my brother-in-law and sister-in-law not once called me to ask me to come back or asked if i'm alive. my husband's side of the family is silent as my husband and thier other son (my brother in law) keep sending money to them, they don't care about me or that their son is not with his wife. i have 3 kids, one i had during year apart from my husband. per my mother in law, she told relatives that my husband cannot live without his brother (my brother in law), so its wierd, my mother in law and no in-laws communicate with my family. my dad called my husband's grandfather to find a solution 3 times, the grandfather hangs up the phone when my dad gets tough with the situation i am. so what can i do? my husband can't seem to leave his brother/his sister-in-law. he has left me and the kids and chose to live with them. my parents can't get in-laws to communicate. my husband has become rude to my parents, no longer talking to them. i see him on weekends for 3-4 hours for kids sake. by the way, when i got married, my husband told me about my sister-in-law's aunt who is part of my husband's family saying she does jadu and tunna and that the fmaily does not like her---- well my sister-in-law is her niece! my husband used to have kesh, keep turban, he's become clean shaven in last year half and seems distant and his eyes empty when i see him. he's changed. doesnt go to gurdwara either.
help me. i am not very educated in our religion (meaning i don't knwo punjabi well) but how can i get some help? what simple shaband can say for husband to return back to me and for him to be like his normal self before my brother-in-law/sister-in-law came? how can i get my husband to see that i and the kids need him and he should be living with us? any simple sayings or shabads i can do to make him be like himself before? is there any hope? thanks for ur time.
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reply
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Dear one, This is tough. I will give you this shabd to recite:
1. Recite: Sopurkh Nirinjan harpurkh niranjan................" and so on from Rehiras 11 times a day for the next 90 days. This is to make your husband a saint and a man of God.

You may need the big guns and do the follwoing as well or instead of above...use your intuition:

"Aad Sach, Jugaad Sach, Hai Bhay sach, Naanak Hosee BHAY sach".
(then recite the first portion of Shabd Haaarey..." Meraa Man loche Gur darshan taa-ee................"

then again: "Aad Sach, Jugaad Sach, Hai Bhay sach, Naanak Hosee BHAY sach".
(2nd letter) "Teraa mukh sohaavaa jio, sehej doon banee................."

then again: "Aad Sach, Jugaad Sach, Hai Bhay sach, Naanak Hosee BHAY sach".
(3rd letter) "Ik gharee na milatay ta kaljug hotaaa................"

then again "Aad Sach, Jugaad Sach, Hai Bhay sach, Naanak Hosee BHAY sach".
(last letter or stanza) :Bhag ho-aa gursant milaa-e-aa prabh..................."

then:"Aad Sach, Jugaad Sach, Hai Bhay sach, Naanak Hosee BHAY sach".
"Aad Sach, Jugaad Sach, Hai Bhay sach, Naanak Hosee BHAY sach".
"Aad Sach, Jugaad Sach, Hai Bhay sach, Naanak Hosee BHAY sach".
"Aad Sach, Jugaad Sach, Hai Bhay sach, Naanak Hosee BHAY sach".

THEN BEGIN AGAIN AND RECITE THIS AS A PRAYER 11 TIMES.
THIS IS VERY POWERFUL. IT KEEPS YOU TOGETHER WITH YOUR BELOVED ONES AND BREAKS
THROUGH THE BLOCKS AND RESISTANCES.....it heals the wounds of love.

Please fine the prayer, get the help and apply yourself in this prayer. This is nothing stronger than the prayer of the mother. God bless you, SK