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Summary of Question:	Parent Pressure
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Saturday, 4/24/2004 2:36 PM MDT

hello. I am a 15 year old sikh living in Canada. Due to the fact that I am growing up in a "white" dominated society, my parents believe it is all the more necessary for me to become attached with my culture and religion, so that I do not forget my roots. They, themselves are very religious. And I find no fault with that. They are baptized, and now they find it mandatory that I become baptized as well. However, I don't think I'm quite ready yet. It's not that I don't believe in our religion and culture. I mean I believe I'm a good person overall. I am not invloved in anything that would in any way disgrace my parents such as drinking, drugs, violence, etc. Yet, I feel bad that I am in some way putting my parents down by not becoming baptized. I do not want to disappoint them, however I'm afraid that if I become baptized when I am not ready for it or am not devoted enough, I may end up breaking my committment towards it. I really do not know what to do.

I would appreciate it if you could give me some advice,
thanx


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Try sitting down with your parents and discussing this issue with them. Start by acknowledging how much you appreciate what good parents they have been. Tell them how much you appreciate their devotion to the Guru, etc. Tell them that you also are devoted to the Guru. Then, ask them if they feel that that devotion and commitment should come from within. They probably will say YES. Then, tell them that you would like to take Amrit, but that you need that commitment to come from within you and you are not quite ready yet. Reassure them that you feel that commitment will come, but that you need a little more time. Talk softly, firmly and with self confidence, but humbly and from the heart. Ask for Guru to guide you...and be sure to pick a time when they are in a good mood and things are harminious. Blessings.