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Summary of Question:	Am I The Only One.
Category:	Other
Date Posted:	Tuesday, 5/18/2004 7:42 PM MDT

I am going through a difficult time. I live a stressful life. Why is everyone else happy. I just want to die. My fiance is always so happy go lucky cause all she does is work all day, and then comes home and does some cooking and thats it. She does not understand that I would do the same too, but when you are racking your brain with stresses than you have to balance your life in different ways. She doesnt say anything to me to make me feel bad or anything. But I feel so little compared to her. She works 12 hours a day and said shes earning money for us. Well I work 8 hours, then come home and do any errands that have to be done and then deal with any household concerns. Such concerns include my alcholic dad. And top of this I am studying. I dont work full time cause I will fall behind in school, and because my mom needs me sometimes cause she is ill. Why do I feel so little now that she has started working more in her time off from school? Am I insecure? I just dont know. I know that God made me into the type of person that I am for a reason. But what is that reason, to be sad and stressed. I just feel worthless.

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I feel that you need some professional help. Seek out a counselor that can help you sort out your life and help you with your depression. Any adivse I could give you would not be long-term. It sounds like your challenges are pretty deep and need to be sorted out over time. Go get a good counselor with whom you feel confident and trusting. My prayers are with you. GTKK