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Summary of Question:	Is It Right To Do Langar For The Dead?
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Saturday, 5/15/2004 4:08 AM MDT

Hi

Im in a bit of a dilemma i needed to ask you a question? my husbands grandmother is doing a langar this sunday for her late husband, he has been dead for many years, and she does a langar for him every year, but i dont understand why she does a langar for someone who is dead, Iv asked my husband who has said its out of respect, but surley this is not right, you cant be doing a langar for someone who is not even with us in this world anymore, this dead person does not remember her anymore as he is probably in some next world, it not right to be still attached to someone who has gone, and are the gurdwara allowed to let anyone do a langar on anything? I personally think this is worship of worshiping the dead who dont even know that ur a doing this for them, did the Shri Guru granth sahib ji not say that once a person has gone you should not cry or be attached to them anymore- please help as if this is the case i dont want to go to the langar as i dont believe this is right

please write back soon as the langar is on sunday 16th, if you cant get back to me before that, it does not matter as long as can have your opinion.

thank you

(REPLY) Sat Nam. Honoring the memory of people who have died is not worshipping them. We do it as a part of our own human desire to remember with affection and appreciation the lives of those whose lives touched our own. Serving langar in honor of someone who has died, no matter how many years ago, is perfectly acceptable. You are right, of course in that when someone dies, we should not "hold on" to them by excessive screaming and weeping. However, we are human beings, and a certain amount of grieving is natural and normal. There is a difference between the love and the loss we feel, and simply being attached. Serving langar is always a blessing for those who prepare it, and those who receive it, in the Name of God and Guru! Your husband's grandmother must have loved her husband very much! And that is beautiful. I hope this will make you comfortable with the upcoming situation. Blessings, SP