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Summary of Question:	Attachment
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Friday, 12/10/2004 10:21 PM MST

Hi

After I read the couple of forums about what attachment (ankaar) means, I understood it a little better, yet I have one question. What does our religion say about attachment to your mom, dad, or your husband or wife? is that against sikhi? Is that ok or not? I am confused I get emotional easily and attachment to things can u help me out plz? know after I read.

(REPLY) Sat Nam. It is very clear that attachment to anything or anybody other than God and Guru keeps us from experiencing the reality of our identity, which is beyond human relationships -- HOWEVER, that does not exclude LOVING and respecting parents, husband or wife. Problem is we confuse love with attachment. They are not the same. Think of attachment as emotional quicksand, into which we get pulled and have no perspective. When we love it is a giving, a sharing, sometimes even a sacrifice. But the way to evaluate all our actions and "feelings" is to know always that God is the Doer, and that all human relationships are temporary, as is this lifetime. We should enjoy this lifetime, amd enjoy the love of family, but keep in the back of the mind always that life is just a school for us to learn how to be as divine as the Gurus, i.e. to put God and Guru first in our lives. Happiness must come from within, from the soul in you, and not dependent upon any outer person or circumstance, for your soul is in harmony with the universal soul, or call it God! I hope this helps in your understanding of the difference between attachment and love. It is not an easy distinction. Also, remember, attachment carries with it the fear of loss, but love does not. Blessings, Sp