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Summary of Question:	Questions That Sp Khalsa Ji Asked..And More About Me
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Friday, 11/29/2002 11:37 AM MST

waheguru ji ka khalsa, waheguru ji ki fateh !

i m the one who asked question regarding "Re:" in which i asked the question..why i get up and mad when i try to come close to Guru and Waheguru..and SP Khalsa ji answerd to that question..i m 23 old sikh girl..and my food was non vegetarian..and yes i eat lots of sugar in coffee..i drink coffee to much..these days i m have stoped eating non veg at all..i don't eat non veg..and fighting from my innerself of not eating meat at all..and by guru's kirpa i m trying hard to walk on guru's teachings..i m the only one in my family..who wants to go on this path..and all my family members and relatives..are religious..but not much..and they don't like the idea of not cutting the hair..not doing the eyebrows..not shaving legs and arms..not listening to songs..and wake up early in the morning..and do my banis..and not eating meat..they are like there is no need of taking amrit at all..they are just like be true and don't harm n e one..i know they are right in this part..but about amrit..i don't think they understand what really it means..neither do i..but i m trying to understand sikhi..and trying to concentrat..that's why i used to get emotional blackmails..that u won't get married..who gonna marry you..they were like we have plans for this that..so i used to get week..i m still week..but they haven't started yet of blackmailing me...but i don't why..i m feeling scared..about that marriage..what if no one wants to marry me..cuz i m sikh..u know no make up this and that..i m trying my best to be strong..and saying myself..if i haven't be sikh..and then u never know if there is marriage in my life even though i wasn't on this path..and then i try not to be stress full..cuz i have many streel full life..in my family..i try hard to do whatever my parents wants..and try to fulfil their dreams..but i always fail..and they are not satisfy..with me at all..and they expect more..i try my hard..but still fails..and cuz of this i m tired..and then i had a trajedy of..breaking my heart..one gursikh guy broke the commitment of marrying me..sorry to tell you this..so i was in that shock too..and i m trying hard to concentrate while i m doing my bani.or when i listening to kirtan..and trying hard to fight with anger and kaam..but for somereason..my mind is never stable..but i have notice one thing..when i m not walking on path of guru's teaching my soul is always lost and crying..and i m crying every single day..but now i m trying..my soul in peace and rest..but my mind is wandering..so this is all about me..and my friends..is muslim..true muslim..and one gursikh friend..i hardly meet with my gursikh friend..so that's it my life..hehehe...but guru's kirpa..i m still alive..taking his name..and try to be true person/sikh..buti don't know to make myself strong..and confident..
thankyou for listening my life story..:)
waheguru ji ka khalsa, waheguru ji ki fateh!

(REPLY)

Sat Nam. Thanks for supplying these details. You have a difficult situation, because your soul wants you to live and be a certain way, and your family seems to pull you in another direction. This is terribly sad. The best I can tell you is that you need to be true to yourself. If you live your life to please other people, you will never be happy. Of course you want to respect your parents, and love them, but they apparently do not have an inclination to be with the Guru, and that is their misfortune. In order to cope with your environment, you need strong nerves, determination, and a lot of patience. Stop worrying about whether you'll get married or not! Marriage isn't the key to happiness. Being a strong, graceful, spiritual woman with a connection to your Guru is what will ultimately make you happy. Marriage can be wonderful, and I'm all for it, but you need to fulfill your own personal heart's desire which you've discovered already means you want to have Guru the most important thing in your life. You will do yourself a favor, and find much strength by doing a couple of things, one: stop drinking coffee and eating sugar --I know that's difficult, but you're just aggravating your nervous system and your inability to control your anger could be related to sugar and caffeine. Second: Read you banis every day, and try to do so not as a ritual, but to understand what Guru is teaching you! Get the hukam every day over SikhNet and every morning, as early as possibly, preferably before sunrise, meditate on your breath, inhaling Sat, exhaling Nam, to remind you that your Identity, the real You is that immortal, self-illlumed, birthless, deathless TRUTH. The body and the mind are temporary vehicles that the soul uses during this lifetime. Make the best of them, keep them healthy and happy, but don't forget they will not last forever -- whereas, your spirit will never die! Get a CD of DHAN DHAN RAM DAS GUR if you can, and sing along or at least listen to this shabd--- Guru Ram Das is the Lord of Miracles, and do not give up hope -- feel the presence of Guru with you with every breath: ANG SANG WAHE GURU. Stick to a vegetarian diet, not only is it healthier for the body, but it will help to keep your mind calm. Do not worry, God is rotating this planet, and He can take care of your routine! Blessings, SP