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Summary of Question:	More On My Self
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Thursday, 3/06/2003 7:01 AM MST

WAHEGURU JI KA KHALSA

WAHEGURU JI KI FATEH
shud I say sorry to that person? bcoz the fight was due to my childish behaviour which I still feel was not intended to harm anybody. And the person is 2 yrs elder to me. And there is also this strong feeling that I live at their place and how can I talk rudely to her? But I dont wish that she feels that I'm being submissive and weak. But if I'm wrong then I want God to make me say sorry to her.
SAT SRI AKAL.
(REPLY) Sat Nam. It takes a very strong and secure person to have the humilty and wisdom to say "sorry" when they have made a mistake. There's a difference between being submissive, and being courteous and polite. If you were at fault, then admitting it, by apologizing would be a good idea, but I would include in the apology a statement to the effect that you really appreciate being there, and want to create as much harmony and peace in the family as you can, and assure the other person that you absolutely do not want to offend in any way. Try to clear the air. Humility is a great vitue, it is not the same as being humiliated! Also, try to think before you speak, so that you don't let words pop out of your mouth that you may regret later. Smile a lot ! And try to remember that God lives and breathes in every other person, even if they say or do something that bothers you. there's always a way to speak diplomatically, if we take the time. So, just take a few deep breaths before speaking, and pray to Guru to guide your words! I hope this helps. (Mediating every day and reading your banis will help you in many, many ways, and I hope you are doing that.) Blessings, SP