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Summary of Question:	My Friends Don't Have Any Faith
Category:	Other
Date Posted:	Sunday, 6/24/2001 2:12 AM MDT

Most of my friends aren't religious at all, even though they are punjabi. The rumours about kids my age aren't totally exagerrated, most of them are actually pretty true, and it hurts when I see my friend or someone I care about act like there's no God..

I'm just gaining the trust back of one guy who I used to be very close to, and we're starting to care a lot about each other.. Even if we got into another fight, I'd still want him to be religious and to have faith in God, but he never listens to me, insisting that his mom does so much paat but his family still has so many problems, and he says that he used to do paat but nothing good ever came out of it and his problems got worse.
I try telling him that PATIENCE and FAITH are key factors, but he really doesn't understand this concept and just doesn't realize why I care so much about religion..
You might think, why do you even talk to this guy, but it's because I care about him as a friend and I always want everyone to get close to God, even if I don't like them.. My friend is so full of the 5 evils, and he knows barely anything about sikhism at all
Culture and the caste system seem even more important to him, and it hurts to see my friends deteriorate like this because I KNOW that it's in them, God is somewhere in them, and they are all blessed

I just don't know how to tell them or what to say
Or how to make them become religious.. Cause I know I can't force anything upon them.. Should I just leave it upto God?
Please help me if you can, I want to save my friend and help him, but the main problem is that he doesn't even think anything's wrong with him at all!

Thanks for any advice I can get..

Waheguru ji ka Khalsa, Waheguru ji kee Fateh

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REPLY
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Dear One:
Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Kee Fateh! You are right, you cannot force anyone to have patience and faith. It is wonderful to see you so concerned, and wanting to share your faith and love of God with others; I know myself the hurt of seeing others in pain because of lack of faith. The thing about faith is that it grows as you practice it. Since he has not TRIED to truly practice faith and trust he has had no results and no faith. You have.

There are 2 things you can do. 1) Pray often for your friends. Ask God that they find their way and understand their own divinity, even if it ends up being a different path than Sikh.
2) Give them EXPERIENCE OF THE NAAM. Practice Naam Simran until you feel comfortable showing others the experience. Create a sacred space, get some ragis or good mantra tapes, have your troubled AND faithful friends over and ask them to simply experience the bliss that comes from Naam Simran. Plan on chanting for at least 31 minutes, and set the ground rule that no one can leave the room once you start. After that, serve some tea and or prashad or sweets. It is the chanting of the Naam that stabilizes the mind and the life. It is not necessarily an overnight experience, but if you create a space and a practice, your life (or your friend's) WILL change. Please see page 817 of Siri Guru Granth Sahib and see the shabad (Bilaval M. 5) ending in number "2.34.64" You can find it here on Sikhnet by clicking on Siri Guru Granth Sahib from http://www.sikhnet.com. This shabad affirms how chanting the Naam changes one's life.

Guru rakha,
-DKK