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Summary of Question:	Follow Up
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Sunday, 2/04/2001 10:17 PM MST

hi,

i just asked a question related to sex within marriage. i just thougth of some other things would appreciate if you could add these answers to the main question

1) is sex meant just for procreation in sikhism

if so

2) then does it mean that you should'nt desire or it or give in to it solely for the pleasure it gives?

and can you please answer these questions including the one i posted earlier with references and according to what the Gurus have or what the SGGS says and not in stance with Yogic beliefs.

thank you and kind regards
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reply
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Sat Nam Ji,

Do you read from the Guru? There are many, many references to the soul bride and her Groom. My understanding is that the bride is anyone, man or woman, and the Groom is the Guru. So if the bride/person makes the Groom/Guru her/his Beloved, there will be bliss and happiness in life and marriage. Interpreting the Guru is a very subjective thing, just as interpreting any spiritual scriptures can be taken many ways. To me, this means that a person will be happy in life and marriage if they make Guru the center of their life and marriage.

When the Guru referres to the "mind", He is talking about concsiousness. How we do anything in life is to be done with consciousness. In other words, it is not good enough to get good grades in school, it is the consciousness in which you are learning. Are you cheating to get good grades, or are you trying your very best? It is not good enough to make a lot of money in a business. As GurSikhs, it is more important how we go about the business. Are we good to our employees; do we give to charity part of what we earn; is our business run in a righteous way? The same is with sex. We can use sex merely as a way to express our lust and passion...or we can use sex as a way to feel the God within our partner and ourselves. God gave us sex and our desires. They are not bad, or to be denied. They are to be recognized with consciousness and grace. If we use sex with a reverence and sacredness, it can bring a husband and wife closer together. It can even heal. But it will not be sacred if there is not trust,
honest and kind communication, commitment to one another, tenderness and a sincere attempt to make the Guru your foundation in the marriage. You must also see the God in yourself and your partner. Sex cannot be sacred if it is a one-night stand. That is lust. But if two people are committed to one another,are married and base their relationship in the Guru, then I think the Guru would delight in their sexual expression to one another. Of course, it is important that sex not be too much or not too little, which needs to be decided by the couple. Honest and open communication, respecting both people's needs is of utmost importance. I hope this helps.

In His Name, Guru Terath Kaur