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Summary of Question:	Great Dilemma
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Tuesday, 11/11/2008 7:10 AM MST

well 1.5 years back i met amritdhari girl and i liked her a lot, it made me took amrit. Then we were very good friends and i always wanted to commit to her, but she was not prepared. But due to some unavoidable circumstances she got engaged to one chardikala singh. This shattered me , i slandered both of them, i was depressed , cudn't concentrate on my guru and studies. But still she kept talking to me and helped me a lot.The problem is that i dont know whether if i keep talking to them , will it affect their relationship and the thought of leaving her completely makes me go crazy, so caught in a vicious circle, plzz help.

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Wahe Guru Ji ka KHalsa
Wahe Guru Ji ki Fateh!

What does it mean to be an amritdhari Sikh? It means that you are Khalsa and that your life revolves around the Guru and the Sangat, not some girl. She may be a wonderful girl, but she is not your wife. She is someone else's wife. You need to focus on your own relationship with your Guru and with the Sangat and let go of your fantasies about this girl. It is hurting you and it is hurting her as well. You are not a victim of your emotions and fantasies. Do your banis and do Sukhmani Sahib da paath every day. Calm up. Let Guru Ji bring you everything you need. There is nothing you need to go after.

.....G