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Summary of Question:	Special Someone
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Friday, 9/06/2002 4:11 PM MDT

Sat Sri Akal, I have asked questions before and you have always been able to give answers that have helped me. I am 21 yrs. old and I am almost done school. I have never had a girlfriend. I have wondered why? But in the past year i have been drawn closer to God, and now i realize that there is more to having a girlfriend than just having fun.... i now don't look at females just on the outside, i now know that there is more to a person than just looks. I now feel like I am in the point of my life to meet the person that will help me on my spiritual journey to meet God, and I can in return help her. I have looked into, what Sikhi says about marriage and i totally follow that now. My quesiontion is that I dont talk to girls at school, and dont really have a soical life, so meeting someone through a friend is totally out of the question. But I do know that if God does have someone out there for me, then it wil happen. Is it okay for me smile at a girl when she walks by, and who knows something might happen after that, like starting a conversation. I know this might sound like a petty issue, but when I think of smiling at a girl, I always feel guilty that I am not following Gods will..... i have noticed that sometimes girls look at me, but I just stare right past them. so would it be wrong for me to smile at them, and say hi and stuff. My intentions would not be bad, rather they would be to get to know the person, and see what happens... Please dont post my name or e-mail, thanks.... You guys are doing awesome seva thanks....

Dear Brother:

First you have to stop having guilt for what is a normal part of life. You have recognized that people are important more than their gender. That is truely a great understanding.
I will tell you that it is okay to talk to girls and as a matter of fact because you will treat them right as people and not objects you will do fine.

Remember that as long as you keep in mind to not disrespect them or yourself you will do ok.

SSM