Previous

Next

Ask a Question

Summary of Question:	Hi
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Monday, 11/11/2002 1:53 PM MST

waheguru ji

i asked you the question reagarding the problem at home with the summary "i can't tolerate this any more"..you asked me some question in the reply..so i want to give you the answer...no dear..me and my sis are affraid of my grandmother[dad's mom]..it's just that..we don't want to speak to her..i totally stoped talking to my dad's family at all..even my dad isn't talking to me..cuz i bad thing about his brother..he used to laugh at me..i said..that he used to laugh at me..now look world is laughing at him now..cuz of his wife..i know i said the bad thing..cuz i wasn't suppose to say..u know i try my best and even hard to go to different room..when arguement starts..but i don't know why..i start crying when i hear my mom cry..and then i m not in myself..i know i m doing bad..not talking to my grandmother..and my dad's family..but believe me..i have nothing in my heart..but i just feel talking to them at all.. i stoped doing my paat..at all..cuz i can't concentrate at all..and i get bad thaughts..can i ask you something..i always get bad dreams..one day i got a dream..that i m running ..in some old building..and some other people..not sure if that my family or not..but i m running from some people..and i m seeing..that one gursikh person..killed one person that he is drinking that person's blood..and then one day..i saw a dream..that in one field..there are many old time gursikh people heads are lying[only head]..and then there was a word or whisper.."waheguru"...and i woke up..and then one day i m getting dream of me sexually..involved with some one..does these dream means..that i don't belive in waheguru..or is it because..i had bad experience with some gursikh people...what is it..i try my best to become good person..but then i get lazy and of doing paat..i think that if i can't concentrate..then why i should insult gurbani..right?..m i doing this right..or is it becuase i m getting punishment from guru maharaj..cuz i know i did amritshak and i broke it..i try hard..to do paat..and even the method you tell us to do stuff for few days..but i always fail to carry on..:(..no idea..i have a lack of confidence..i m feeling that whatever i m studying..i m not getting..i m failing courses..i m computer programming course..in my last year..i know computer is my field..but don't know..i m failing..i feel i m trying my best..but comes out that i m not..what should i do..i want to depend on myself and on my waheguru..not on any one any more..plzz tell me..how should i do..why i feel that waheguru isn't with me..why?
(REPLY) Sat Nam. Wahe Guru is always with you. You have cut off communication yourself, not only from your grandmother, but from God and Guru by stopping reading your banis. No matter how bad your concentration is, read them anyway! Play Gurbani Kirtan all night while you sleep -- ignore your bad dreams, they don't mean anything. They are just all your anger and resentment and fear bubbling up from your subconscious. If you are smart, you will start praying for and blessing all the members of your family, so that your clear out the bad feelings in your own heart. No matter what anyone does, we have to live with our own attitudes, and though of course we need to protect ourselves when necessary, having kind and blessing thoughts toward ALL is what we as Sikhs pray for at the end of every ARDAS! Start sending love to your father, and everyone else (silently) and don't argue or fight, and ask Guru's help in everything you do. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You are responsible for your own feelings. No one else can make you feel bad unless you permit them! Let God and Guru help you. Blessings, SP