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Summary of Question:Talking To Mum And Dad About My Future
Category:Love & Marriage
Date Posted:Wednesday, 9/02/2009 8:18 AM MDT

Hiya,


I am having a hard time, I am trying to bring up the courage to talk to my parents about wanting to marry my bf, however I can not say it as im too sceard to tell them I have been seeing someone and his family are not the same as ours. My parents are very narrow minded and will not move with the times and say arranged is the only way.

I pray to god and asked for help but still so hard.

Please give advised on the best way to approach this.

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REPLY
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Dear Saleena,

Marriage is a very serious commitment. It requires a lot of work, compromise, strength to carry on through good and bad times. It brings lots of challenges into our lives that we can not predict. If you can not find the strength to tell your parents bout it ... it may just mean you are not ready for that kind of commitment. If you are thinking of just doing it by yourself and your beloved boyfriend is not backing you up on it and not willing to go with you to face your parents than you are both not ready for it, then you are living an illusion.

If you can't do this together how are you going to face the world together? Telling your parents is the least of your problems in this situation. Only people who are mature enough to handle all the consequences can really handle a marriage.

Only you know how to approach your parents. If your parents react negatively to your union than that will be just the first test of your strength.

Think this over and really figure out whether you are ready for this kind of commitment first. Try to really see for what it is. Is this guy worth going through the trouble? Then try to figure out how strong you are and how strong your boyfriend is and if you are truly ready to support one another.

Anything is possible if you want to do it but ask your self how far you are willing to go with this. How far is he willing to go with you? Are you prepared to share the burden of everything marriage entails TOGETHER, starting with this and for the rest of your lives?


Good Luck,
DKK



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