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Summary of Question:	I M Going Crazy
Category:	Other
Date Posted:	Tuesday, 12/05/2000 12:20 PM MST

i m 14 yrs of age.i m depression and living wit anxiety as well.it all started when i was humilated in front of a crowd in school by my living skill teacher.she humilated and threated me that she would expell me from the scholl if i do not deny for what i had said to my principle regarding her misconduct.Due to that, i had low self esteem becouse my good and clear reputation had been stolen .everybody was talking about me in scholl which says that i m over sensitive, rude and lazy, in contrast, i m a bright student at scholl.

after the incident, i couldn't get rid of it of my mind. i have lost concentration and poor memory.From what i know, stres may cause poor memory and concentration.in addtion, i had sense something unusual about the felling i m having till today.it's like ,i have no sense of emotions in me and the person in me(intuition) refuse to communicated with me.... it's hard to describe and i fellling wooried about it. for an instance , when i m being scoled or humilated , i would not fell anything..neither sad nor embrassed and there is no happiness in my life.i have low self estemm ,i tend to stammer whennever i confronted someone of the opoosite sex.AM i going mental?i want be be like other human beings who have fellings and emotions and i m absent minded as i tend to forget things and i m suffering frm insomnia.
i just dont wwant to live like that. it's just soo irritating and annoyying when i m not felling happy , sad or anything. i have done many things to get rid of these. i prayed but to no avail.plzz, tell me wat is happening to me and how can i solve it otherwise i m just not staying in this world anymore if it keeps bothering me!.. plzz help me!
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Reply
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Greetings to you in the Name of God the life of every soul and in the Name of Guru the life of every SIkh.

Dear one, your young life is so full of emotion and challenge. It is humiliating to be treated so unfairly at school. However great the challenge you can use the Guru and Gurbani for support and master the challenge. The technology of the Guru will make you strong and masterful. This is how you must do it.

You are your own project. You must work with yourself like you are your own child that needs training. The mind is a slippery thing. Every second it fills with 1,000 thoughts, and this can be overwhelming. Have you ever heard the saying by Guru Nanak?. "Man jeettay jagjeet". Win your mind and you will win the entire world.

All your focus on Gurbani should help you become confident and clear and masterful of all situations when you use it correctly. Here is one technique for you to master over the next 90 days. It is a base for you to start with.

When you are emotional, your breathing becomes shallow and short. When your breathing is long and slow and deep, your neutral center becomes activated and the God given intuition will flow through you and direct you in all situations.

First, you must make a very quiet and clean space for yourself where you can meditate undisturbed every day for 31 minutes. You may need to find a time when your can have this peace without interfering with your family routine. Perhaps early in the morning or after school would work.

You must sit in an easy croslegged position with your spine straight, shoulders and stomach and neck relaxed. Be sure that you are breathing from your naval point and not from your chest. You may need to retrain your breathing to expand from the belly button rather than from the chest.

Set your timer or clock for 31 minutes. You will be doing a one minute breath, always BREATH THROUGH THE NOSE.

You must start out by segmenting your breath evenly. For example: inhale through your nose and count to 8. Hold the breath in for the count of 8, and then exhale through the nose for the count of 8. You will have to do your counting mentally.

After you do this a few times, instead of counting 1-2--3-4-5-6-7-8, use the word Sat nam and mentally say; Sa Ta Na Ma Sa Ta Na Ma for each segment of your breath. Sa Ta Na Ma Sa Ta Na Ma as you inhale. Sa Ta Na Ma Sa Ta Na Ma as your hold your breath in, and Sa Ta Na Ma Sa Ta Na Ma as you exhale. Do this a few times.

As you become more comfortable, increase the number of Sa Ta Na Ma's for each part of your breath. Always keep the segments the same. In fact you can use each one of your fingers to keep count that you are being consistant for each breath.

For example, when I am mentally saying Sa Ta Na Ma, I usually keep count on my fingers, one finger for each Sa ta na ma. For me, saying it ten times(ten fingers worth) is 20 seconds. So, inhale for 20 seconds, hold for 20 seconds and exhale for 20 seconds----this equals a minute.

When you do this meditation for 31 minutes, you should be able to work your way up to 20 second inhale, 20 seconds holding the breath and 20 seconds exhaling. Really concentrate on controlling your breath. After a while it will become easy.

When you finish relax onto your back and deeply relax your entire body. Use your mind to feel the presence of the Guru. Feel the Guru loving you and supporting and surrounding you with love and protection. Visualize the Guru as well as feel the Guru.

You will find yourself becoming very calm and confident. You will be amazed at the results. Keep this practice to yourself until you have mastered it. Better not to sabatage yourself before you have experienced and made yourself successful. Do this for the next 90 days. If you miss one day then you must start the next day as day one and begin again until you have completed all 90 days without missing a day.

Guru Gobind Singh would breathe one breath per minute. He was a great master of his life and destiny.

God bless you and guide you and keep your spirit rising to meet the test of the times. God bless you and surround you with all His love and protection.