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Summary of Question:	Family Problems With New Baby
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Sunday, 1/27/2008 11:02 PM MST

Sat Nam ji,

My sister married my long distant cousin last december. One of the reason behind the marriage was that both of the families knew each other. my cousin is a twin and his brother got married around the same time. my sister moved to Italy where my cousins live and accordingly to the indian tradition both of the twins are living in the parents home. From the get go my other cousins wife did not seem to get a long with my sister. My sister is a very kind hearted and a humble person who believes in the Guru. my sister tried her best to get a long with my cousins wife, who is favored by her father-in-law for some reason. my sister felt like she was not being treated equally by the in-laws from the start. My cousins wife seem to get her way most of the times. A month ago my sister had a baby, and now things have started to get out of control for her. after my sister was tired of being to nice to my cousins wife she decided she is not going to be so nice to her anymore and she said said one awful thing to her father in law. which really upset him. from that day on he does not treat her so well. she apologized to him again and again for the mistake that she made but he is not giving in an inch. She has been crying so hard not once did the in laws tried to comfort her, like they do to my cousins wife when she is upset. my sister has held in everything for the longest time to herself even after my mom asked her again and again if everything was fine. but with stress of a newborn baby who constantly needs to be tended to and with the stress from the in laws now she has come out and is breaking down. She cried so much over the phone to my mom.

When my mom asked me what to do the only thing i could think of is that she has yet not recovered from her c-section, she is going to be scarred and the only way to come out of it is by her coming back to India for the support she needs right now. plus in India there is a custom after a girl has a baby she goes back to stay with her parents for a while. My cousin is supporting my sister to the fullest but he is going nuts also from the family problems.

For now can you please tell me what needs to be done here. what banis and mantras she needs to do to feel strong and move through this difficult time. i was thinking maybe Gobinday Mukande or Ajai Alai or bhand jammee-ai bhand nimmee-ai bhand mangan vee-aahu. But i don't know for sure what she needs. Will you be so kind to provide me with your email so i can talk to faster?
Please give me some insight and show me the way so my sister can heal

---------reply----
Sat nam. Any bani or mantra you feel called to recite to heal a situation can be chanted with such intention as remedy. So this is the first rule: go with your gut on this. You can also chant Dhan Dhan Raam Das Gur shabd to effect a healing miracle. Try to play kirtan or gurubani in the location(s) involved to create a calming environment as well.
Guru ang sang,
DK