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Summary of Question:	Pre Marital Sex
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Wednesday, 12/22/1999 9:55 AM MST

A friend of mine had premarital sex with her boyfriend whom she was going to marry, but due to him being a different religion she was ridled with guilt and decided to end the relationship, so that she would not cause a disgrace or pain to her parents. She is know depressed and can not face the fact that she has commited a huge sin and now realises her mistake of sleeping with someone before

marriage. I don't know what to say to her as i don't know myself if god forgives you for such a mistake. She is really emotionally screwed up and needs some guidance she can't talk to anyone else. Please help as to the best way she can deal with her mistake and begin to rebuild her life

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REPLY
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Dear One, sorry for the delay.
God DOES forgive you, for anything, so long as you sincerely want to be forgiven. Really, this is about her forgiving herself. In Sikh faith, God is all-in-all, God made each one of us, and it is by His will that we are led astray and thus instructed. So, apparently God thought she needed to understand the consequences of her actions. There are many many posts on this site about love and marriage, but really, she needs counseling, or she will be scarred for life over this. The most damaging energy one can inflict upon oneself is guilt. She must not feel guilty and act out her guilt for the rest of her life on this, that's my prayer. Tell her to do paath and lots of naam simran to steady her mind. In time, she will have hindsight to understand her actions and forgive herself, and move ON.

Guru rakha,
-DKK