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Summary of Question:	My Life.
Category:	General Sikhism
Date Posted:	Saturday, 1/22/2000 1:21 PM MST

i really need an answer on this.

i took amrit last yr. and then, i met this singh and we had sex.
we were both amritdhari. i know that means that we've broken our amrit.
we wanted to marry each other. but its not going to work out. we really want to be with each other, and i find it hard to understand why this is happeneing to me. i have so many problems and i'm so confused with my life.
i feel bad for what iv'e done. and i really dislike my life.
i know i've comitted a sin. i was wondering, that when i take amrit again..
do i have to tell the panj pyaarai about what i've done? if so, why? and what if they dont let me take amrit again? i know what i've done wrong. and i'm sorry for all the stupid things i've done. but isn't it part of life to make mistakes and learn from them?

----- Reply -----

Your confusion and bad feelings about yourself are the biggest problem. Please go to the Guru and as you bow, lay your confusion, doubt and bad feelings before the Guru and offer them to him. Offer yourself in Guru's service and ask Guruji for guidance. When water is muddy, you must let it be still so that the mud can settle and the water can become clear again. Meditate and let your emotions settle down - let clarity come. Calm your mind and emotions with Guru's bani. Your amrit is between you and your Guru. If you are ready, you should take your amrit vows again. Guru forgives you, but you must forgive yourself. That is most important. You may retake your vows. The Panj Pyaare most likely will not ask you for any details - but if you are asked, simply say "I had sex before marriage, but now I am ready to take the Amrit again". The Panj Pyaare may give you 'thankah', which is usually a seva. If so, do the seva that the Panj Pyaare give to you. All will be well. It is between you and your Guru.

May Guru bless you with peace and the gift of His service.

Wahe Guruji ka Khalsa
Wahe Guruji ki Fateh!

.....G