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Summary of Question:	Girl I Love
Category:	Health
Date Posted:	Thursday, 7/03/2003 3:47 PM MDT

waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh

Hi i have posted many times on here and i feel that i am a well rounded Sikh Amritari guy. However comming to GuruJi i have found all my problems in life are within me, i will fail if i dont undertand myself. I have a huge problem and its tearin gme up inside. For many many years i had problems and as i read bani as if a miracle they dissapeared, like i cant explain this but my mnd was eased. I now have a issue that is messing my mind up so much. 3 years ago i met a girl before i was amrithari or even into sikhi and i fell for her so badly, i know im not supposed to get attached but i did and a year later she told me she liked another guy, like we neevr did anything just we talked, laughed and i fell inlove with her mind, her personality. 1 yr has passed and even though i meditate everyday, read bani, this is a issue i cant get over. I cant even look at other woman, i love her that much. I cant move on. I wake and i think of her, i sleep and think of her and i know this is my weakness. I tried for months to forget her but i cant, its like i need her. We are close freinds but the more i get freinds with her the more i like her. Im always depressed, moody and i emailed her yesterday telling her that i have to cut off calling her and talking to her till i get over her. Like what is wrong with me and why is this effecting me so much. I know ur probabily going to say i dont know what love is but i do, even though it is not returned i feel stupid, so why cant i get passed her? Inside it kills me, life seems wothless like no use to contunie, i know i should accept the hukam of Gods choices but im just confued, i love her :( If i cut myslef rom her our freinship will suffer and we are so great, if i keep our freindship i will suffer :( I think of what she si doing day and night. So many aspects of maya i have succesfully controlled, i show love, and talk sweet, materialism seems so dull to me now, my fears fro life have gone, i allow whatever to happen but this is soooo hard. I dunno i sound crazy and i know lookin from the outside it seems like a simple problem but why is this ruining my whole aspect of sikhi, why is this so strong. Plz reply

(REPLY) Sat Nam. It is unfortunately true that many men get bewitched by a woman, and suffer just as you are suffering. As painful as it may be, your best course is to stop communicating with her, so that you do not continue to reinforce the connection with her, and sincerely and honestly pray to be free of this obsession. I agree, it is hard, and I know you are in pain, but put your faith in the Guru, try to read in Akhand Path, and call on Guru Ram Das, the Lord of Miracles to heal you of this attachment. May God bless you, and Guru be your salvation.