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Summary of Question:	Arranged Marriage Faces Love Marriage
Category:	Love & Marriage
Date Posted:	Monday, 3/27/2000 2:17 PM MDT

Sikhs these days cheat on their spouses, usually caused by arranged marriages. I'm a 19 year old female and to tell the truth,I don't agree with arranged marriages. I like this guy, he's Sikh as well, we both respect our religion,but my parents don't and will never agree to a love marriage. Instead of living a miserable live, I think I should spend my life with the person I love. I cannot see myself with another person. What do you think I should do?

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Reply
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Cheating on your spouse is not caused by arranged marriage. It is caused by lack of commitment to your word and understanding what marriage means to your own soul. In America the divorce rate is over 50%, and they are all "love" marriages. The cheating rate is also very high in these "love" marriages.
People change over time. The person you married will not be there in 10 or 20 years. Only the soul and the God in them is the same. If you are not marrying the God in them, you are taking your chances either way.
Love marriages can and do work, but they are no guarantee of anything either.
I am a western born sikh that had an arranged marriage. We are in our 29th year and doing great because we married the Dharma in each other, not the personality. If you don't even know the person, you have to relate to the God in them. There's no other way. It makes you see God in everything.
This is a choice you have to make. It is your life and your soul's journey. You should meditate on it and read from SGGS. Let the Guru show you the way, not your emotions.
LSK