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Summary of Question:	Sucide
Category:	Sikh Practices
Date Posted:	Tuesday, 11/25/2003 4:55 PM MST

Waheguru ji ka khalsa Waheguru Ji Ka Fateh,

I'm going through a depression and on top of that I'm losing my connection with Waheguruji. Ever Since I got out of high school and entered college things have been very hectic and I just can't handle them. Yes I know that it's apart of life but I use to find time no matter what to go to the gurdwara or do naam simran and go and hang with good sangat, but not anymore. And this is really hurting me and making me feel sad and hopeless. Also I have a low self esteem and It's because of my big brother, I can't do nothing basically I live in fear because of my brother and I have nowhere to go and my parents can't do anything and all he ever does is put me down and I can't do anything because physically he's bigger than me, and he can hurt me like he has in the past I was put in the hospital because of him. So basically I stay in my room and live here in fear...and then I think about Waheguruji and I say and pray why can't i be with you again, I want to go back home, and I try to commit sucide but then I think Waheguruji will get mad at me If I do that, my question is: Is It A Sin, if you commit sucide? I mean I have to, I can't live my life and it's all because of my Big brother and the most sickening thing is that he goes to the gurdwara and does seva from his "HEART" he does not know what seva is, and yet nothing ever bad happens to him. Also He has a haircut and no RESPECT FOR SIKHI or THE GURUS OR THE TURBAN and yet he calls himself a Sikh. He Calls me stuff like Bin Laden, makes fun of my crown and my beard.
I know that my so called "Brother" is not a good person I know that, he ruins even my family's peace of mind, there's nothing I can do, please answer my question.

<<<<< REPLY >>>>>

Wahe Guru Ji ka Khalsa
Wahe Guru Ji ki Fateh!

You are going through a big test right now. The choices you make will determine your future. First of all, suicide is not a good option. You went through 8.4 million incarnations to attain the gift of this human life. Do you really want to start all over again? Because if you commit suicide, you will have to start from the beginning and go through every incarnation all over again. You will have rejected a great gift from God.

Okay, now that you understand the consequences of that choice, what are your other choices? Your brother has power over you only because you have granted him that power. As long as you are afraid of him, you give him power over you. You have to take a stand.

Go to Guru Ji and bow and consciously hand over this situation to him and let go of it. Make a space for Guru Ji to work and resolve your problem and then let him do it. It's not about something bad happening to your brother. Let go of that. Nirbhau Nirvair! Before you can take a stand on the physical plane, you have to give up your fear and take a stand in your own consciousness.

Now is the time!

.....G