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Summary of Question:	Problems At Uni
Category:	Other
Date Posted:	Thursday, 5/23/2002 5:05 PM MDT

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

I dont know if it is such a big problem or not but it seems to be affecting me.

From January till mid April, I was in clinical placement. As I was in a small group, I was able to concentrate on my part and simran. But now that I have come back to college, my closeness to God seems to have disappeared and I feel extremely lonely. I am the only Sikh girl in the whole of the accommodation that I am currently living in with an ambition to be an amritdhari. I get along with everybody whether they smoke or drink, that doesnt seem to bother me. All that matters is that I dont go clubbing or go to a pub. For this everybody respects me and they are really caring. Is it due to my interaction with people, who do things that are forbidden in the Guru Granth Sahib Ji, that God has let go of me?

Today, one girl screamed at me over a trivial matter and there was only so much I could take because I screamed back at her telling her to sort her behaviour out. Before, she used to nit pick like I am going to have a boring time if I am not going out with anybody, things like that. She tells everybody else what to do as well. I used to ignore her because I knew everybody were okay with me but today I just lost my temper and I cried afterwards because I had not done that for such a long time and felt I really let God down. I was peaceful with no hassles and I really want that back more than anything in the world.

Also, I need your opinion on this incident: There are some guys around here who are very touchy, most are greeks. One of them tried to place his hand on my head once and other times came quite close to me. He really tried my patience as I had told him amy times, and I was not having any of that nonsense so I sharply told him to leave me alone and dont even try to talk to me. It was the only way he would back off and he has not spoken to me since and I must say that I am glad. Did I do the wrong thing?

The thing is I cannot help being friendly with everybody. This is who I am and I just have to hi to someone I meet in passing because it produces a friendly atmosphere. This seems to give some people the wrong idea and it is so frustrating.

I have another question now: I am hearing impaired, I read the answer you gave somebody about listening to a shabad that performs miracles. Is my problem trivial to even think about asking for a miracle?

I am sorry for writing such a long email. I look forward to hearing from you. Thank you and God Bless You.

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

REPLY

Sat Nam. Your problems are not trivial! It takes a lot of courage and commitment to hold on to your values in the situation where you don't have support of others living to those standards , but it sounds as if you are doing really well! You did absolutely right to tell the guy to keep his hands off you! Don't hesitate to make it very clear that you will not tolerate any disrespect. It is wonderful to be friendly, and pleasant to everyone, so long as they don't misinterpret your saying "hi." I think if you are very clear in yourself as to your identity as a graceful woman - not just some "girl" -- they will get the idea! And if not, tell them to "back off" in no uncertain terms! Believe me, you have the power to do this. As for your hearing problem, have you tried to get medical help? If you can't listen to shabds, you can read them, and chant them to yourself. And remember that God NEVER abandons anyone! Sometimes circumstances make us feel alone, but that is just a time of trial that we have to go through, but remember, every time you inhale, God is giving you the breath of life! So, if you are feeling abandoned, just meditate on your breath, and inhale SAT and exhale NAM and that will connect your mind to the fact that God lives and breathes in you! SAT , of course means "Truth" and NAM means "Identity" -- and SAT NAM helps remind us that our identity - our permanent Self is One with God. So, Keep up -- and you will be kept up!

Blessings with love, SP